The Marriage of Heaven and Hell
by vivianmagic
Summary: I'm not writing anymore summaries... Yeah, can't you tell it's HiruMamo?
1. Chapter 1: The Proposal

Summary: As a team, they're invulnerable. But as a couple? HiruMamo for sure.

Disclaimer: I don't own Eyeshield 21

The Marriage of Heaven and Hell

The Proposal

It was their 1278th date (the number is totally random)

"Hiruma-kun," Mamori asked curiously, "how long have we been dating?"

"5 year 7 months 13 days 8 hours 29 minutes and 46 seconds to be exact."

"Did you just make that up?" Mamori said sceptically.

Hiruma shrugged, "You have a fucking better answer?"

"I just can't stand you acting in this... this certain manner of yours which I find it hard to describe."

"Every time you walk away saying things like 'I've had enough, Hiruma-kun!' or 'If you keep doing this then we're over!', it proves you a fucking liar." Hiruma ended his remarks with a sneer

Mamori made a face, "So my keeping coming back to you made me a ridiculous woman?"

"Like I fucking care..." Hiruma looked away, but still holding her hand.

"Well, however long we've been together, it's not long enough... You remember _that_ day, Hiruma-kun?" She gently lied her head on his shoulder.

Hiruma remained silent for a second or so before he said, "You mean _that_ fucking stupid day..."

"It was not stupid, Hiruma-kun..."

--------------------------------------------------FLASHBACK--------------------------------------------------------

It was their last day in the Devil Bats. By that time, the team had finished the World Cup with all their dreams realized and it was time for the 2nd grader to leave the team.

A good-bye party was arranged by Suzuna and Sena for Hiruma, Musashi, Kurita, Yuki, invisible Ishimaru (sorry about that) and of course, Mamori.

The clubroom was noisy as hell when the Hah-hah brothers took out 3 water guns and started shooting. Hiruma was the only one who didn't join the craze. He left before anyone had noticed.

But Mamori saw him leaving and followed right away.

"Hiruma-kun, where are you going? The party isn't over yet."

"Fucking bubble gums, just ran out." He answered without turning around.

Mamori smiled and caught up with him. "Guess what, Hiruma-kun?" She took out a pack of bubble gums from her pocket. "Here you are. And yes, it's sugarfree."

"So I guess you're asking for a truck-load of fucking creampuffs in return?"

"Can't you just say 'Thank you' instead of mocking to show your gratitude?"

Hiruma only let out a quite sneer.

They walked to the sports field and sat on the grass side by side. The night was incredibly clear and the moon was beautiful as ever.

"So, how do you think of the party, Hiruma-kun?"

"Fine, fucking fine."

"I guess that's your way of saying 'Terrific!'. 'Wonderful!' and 'Fabulous!'?"

"Whatever."

"Suzuna and Sena did try really hard to make the party fun. But no matter what, when the party ends, we still have to say good-bye to the team." Mamori sighed as her nose started to feel funny.

Hiruma didn't say anything until the sound of Mamori sobbing went into his sharp ears.

"Are you fucking crying, fucking manager?"

"Sorry, Hiruma-kun, so sorry." Mamori apologized as she wiped her tears. "I just couldn't help it. I actually cried last night and thought if I had cried once, I wouldn't be crying tonight. But... I just couldn't help it."

"The fucking shrimp will take care of the team. Just fucking quit worrying." Hiruma lied down on the grass, gazing at the night sky.

"I wasn't worrying about the team, Hiruma-kun. I just can 't imagine what it will be like if I am no longer the manager and you no longer the quarterback."

"Things fucking change, Anezaki."

"I guess so. Oh, I was being so emotional." Mamori covered her face with both of her hands and let out a laugh, "What did you just call me, Hiruma-kun?"

"Anezaki. What? You just reminded me that you're no longer fucking manager."

Mamori sighed, "Well, I guess I'm going to miss that name... Funny, isn't it? I was so repelled to that name but now, I actually find it quite, quite cute... But you'll never call me manager again. Starts from tomorrow, we'll just be classmates. No more teammates."

The two remained silent for a while until Mamori suddenly started humming a soft rhythm and at the same time, tapping on the grass. Hiruma also took out the gum she gave him and began chewing while his empty hand wandered. The two hands just happened to reach for one another. The result was clear, they both felt the warmth of the other's hand.

But neither took their hand back as their fingers slowly entwined. It was a moment when both of them felt that they'd longed for this feeling for a very long time. It was strange that they didn't feel awkward at all.

"You were wrong, Anezaki," Hiruma smirked, "we ain't just fucking classmates."

"Okay, I admit." Mamori smiled and lied her head on his chest. "I love you, Hiruma-kun."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Now that was the most fucking stupid part of the evening." Hiruma remarked.

"You are one cold-blooded bastard, Hiruma-kun."

"Looks like our lovely Anezaki sen-sei is pissed off." Hiruma laughed and pull her to his face.

"Stop it, Hiruma-kun, I'm a school teacher! What if one of my students just walks by and sees me like this?"

Hiruma frowned, "Like I fucking care..." And he kissed her. It was their 8459th kiss.

Mamori was completely silent on their drive home.

"We've been together for 5 year 7 months 13 days 8 hours 29 minutes and 46 seconds plus the 15 minutes and 17 seconds we just lived and yet you're still mad at me for kissing you on the fucking street?"

Mamori didn't answer.

Hiruma glanced at her. "Anezaki, " He called, "will you fucking marry me?"

Mamori immediately turned her head and stared at him in complete shock. "Did you just ask me to... Marry you?"

"Are you fucking deaf?"

"No!"

"Then just fucking answer me!" He said impatiently.

"Why do you have to use the f-word in every sentence you say? If you want me to marry you, try to use proper speech for at least once in your life!"

"If you like proper speech, marry a fucking literature professor! Just say yes since I'm so far the only man in the world that you wish to marry."

Mamori almost jumped up in anger, "Well, can't you just ask me politely since I'm the only woman in the world who actually wants to marry a man like you!"

"You just fucking said yes." Hiruma smiled, amused by his sweet victory.

"I _what_?" Mamori gasped, and then buried her head in her arms, "It's your win, Hiruma-kun."

And so that was how an angel agreed to marry a devil.

Omake 1: How Other Men Proposed

Koutarou & Julie:

Julie picked up her phone, "Hello?"

"Look outside the window, Ju!"

"Koutarou, is that you?" Julie put her hand on her hips.

"Just lift your curtains!" He urged.

"How did you know my curtains are..." Right at the second she lifted her curtains, a football flew right past her window with a banner saying "Marry ME, Ju!" hanging on it.

"That was incredibly SMART, right?" Koutarou cheered in excitement.

Julie was silent for a second before she shouted at the phone, "Stop doing stupid things, moron!"

"I take that as a yes, Ju!" Completely ignoring her blames, Koutarou once again cried out, "That was smart!"

But he was right.

Rui and Megu:

Megu walked out her apartment building and found a gang of motorcycles blocking her way. She knew who each of these motors belonged to. It seemed that Rui had planned something.

Just then, a sharp-colored racing car stopped in front of her.

"What is all these about?" Megu asked.

"Do you like the car?" Rui asked inside the car.

"It's pretty hot."

"Good, want to have it?" Rui tempted her.

"Are you bribing me into doing something?" Megu sensed the unusual tone in his voice.

Rui laughed, "Just can't hide anything from you, can I? Well then, you know what to say if you really want this baby."

"So am I supposed to say, 'Yes, I will marry this car.'?"

"Got that right."

They got married right away, in the car. There was never a wedding.

Marco & Maria:

The two were in their private spring, enjoying the heat.

"Try my newly-made cola, will you, Maria?"

"You want to give me a heart attack?" She glared at him coldly.

Marco broke into laughter, "Don't look at me this way, beauty. Just try it."

"God knows what you're up to..." She opened the bottle he handed to her and started drinking. "I don't find no difference..."

"Just drink it dry, slowly."

That was when Maria felt an ice cube falling into her mouth, icing her tongue.

"Don't swallow the cube, just melt it with your tongue."

Maria flipped the cube in her mouth a few times and felt a cold ring-shaped thing which never melted. She took it out. It was indeed a diamond ring.

"Marry me, Maria."

How could any girl possibly turn such a romantic down?

Taka & Karin:

The two were walking on the riverbank when Taka suddenly asked, "Have I ever missed any ball you threw to me?"

"I don't think so." Karin answered.

"Then, what if I throw something to you? Will you catch it?"

Karin was puzzled but agreed anyway, "Why, I'll just try. But I don't know if I can do this. I hope it's not something really valuable."

"No worries, Karin." Taka comforted and ran about 20 feet further.

"Here you go!" He shouted as a small object flew out from his hand.

Karin was totally unready for that but quickly jumped up and CATCH!

It was a small black box with silver ribbons tied outside.

"See what's in it!" Taka was running back.

Karin opened the box and guess what, there was a shiny ring inside.

Sena & Suzuna:

It was the first time Sena invited Suzuna to such a fancy restaurant.

"It's not even my birthday today, Sena." She said in surprise.

"I know, I know. I just thought maybe we should enjoy a little romance once in a while."

"But you shouldn't have taken me here! God, this is like the most expensive restaurant in Tokyo." Suzuna cuold only marvel at the luxurious decorations all around her.

Sena bit his lips, recalling the next step. "Would, would you like some music, Suzuna?"

"Sure!" She answered, still lost in wonder.

But once the violinist stood next to the table, Sena forgot his next step again.

"Why do you look so nervous, Sena? Are you cold?"

Sena shook his head, smiling stiffly.

"But you don't look so well. Shall we return?"

"No, no, Suzuna... It's just..." He directly ran to the last step and gave up all the ones in between since he had forgotten most of them. "Will... Will you marry me, Suzuna?"

_I should have known this romantic-till-you-drop was a bad idea..._ Sena thought.

Suzuna was numb with shock, "What did you just said, Sena?"

"He asked if you wanted to marry him." The violinist answered, "I've never seen anyone so nervous as he is."

Suzuna finally said yes after screaming in joy for a few minutes, which was completely unexpected for Sena.

------------------------------------------------------

"I deserve a better proposal." Mamori sighed as she recalled how other guys proposed. "You sound like you just asked me to marry you on the spur of the moment... You weren't even planning anything!"

"I only care about the fucking results."

He was right, there was nothing to talk about since she had already said yes.

"Horrible man..." She muttered. But secretly, she smiled in relief.


	2. Chapter 2: The Preparation

2. The Preparation

"Yah, that must have been surprising for you, Mamo-neechan!" Suzuna said enviously, "I wish Sena can be so direct about what he wants."

The two were in a wedding shop.

"No, it was more like a joke than a surprise." Mamori corrected, "Can you imagine, Suzuna? We had just had a small quarrel and he suddenly asked me to marry him! This doesn't make sense at all! I still doubt his sincerity. I guess the idea only flashed once in his mind before he put it into words. God, why did I say yes..."

"According to You-nii, you never said yes."

"Right... But I did somehow show that I was willing. Anyway, how do you like this dress?"

"Gorgeous!" Suzuna praised admiringly, "I wish mine was as beautiful as this one."

"But you've just had your wedding 3 months ago... You are still acting like a teenager." Mamori turned a few times and checked herself out in the mirror.

"Where is everybody else, Suzuna?" Mamori remembered she had call up the other managers, and Karin also for lunch that day.

Suzuna checked her cell, "It's not yet 10 o'clock, Mamo-neechan. I'm sure they'll be here soon. Oh, and Wakana-chan said she couldn't come today. She has been pretty busy lately."

When the two ladies were talking, Karin rushed in,"Sorry! Am I late? I forgot to bring my watch... Sorry for having kept you waiting!" She just couldn't stop apologizing.

"No, you're earlier than everyone else." Mamori comforted, "C'mon, Karin, this is what you're here for-from your artist eyes, what do you think of this dress?" And they discussed cheerfully.

In came Julie, along with Maria. "Hey, starting already? How many dresses have you tried on?" Julie walked up to Mamori and started to feel the texture of the dress with her hand.

"Wow, Maria, you're wearing a new lipstick!" Mamori noticed the unusual dark red color on her lips.

Maria nodded, "Uh-huh, new product, cola-flavored lipstick. Only available for me, sorry."

"So Marco has been working in his secret cola lab lately, isn't he?" Julie said, laughing.

Maria nodded again, "But I doubt his purpose of designing this lipstick. I guess he enjoyed the taste of the lipstick more than the kiss itself..."

And then they were back to the clothes.

"Have you bought a veil yet, Mamori?" Julie asked, "If not, I'll lend you mine."

Mamori immediately shook her head, "I've already got one, thanks." But she lied only to prevent Julie from lending her a whole set of clothing from the 70s. Not that they didn't look good, Julie looked wonderful in them. But she thought they might be too small for her. And most importantly, Hiruma would hate it.

-----------------------------------------

Hiruma opened his door, "Why are you fucking here?"

There stood Musashi, Kurita, Sena and Monta.

"Can't we just have one more visit to you when you're still single?"

Hiruma ignored Musashi and poked Kurita on his arm, "Take the back door, fucking fatty, it's wider."

"Sorry, Hiruma..."

And finally, they all sat in the living room with a cup of coffee in their hands.

"You know why we came without informing?" Musashi asked.

Hiruma sipped his coffee, "To play my grandmother. Should I be fucking thankful?"

"Well, we only came to see how's everything going. Rings ready yet? Anezaki complained to me that you didn't even have a ring when you proposed, is that true?"

"Fucking true. And the fucking rings are ready now."

"So you just asked her right after the idea came into your mind?"

"Uh-huh."

Musashi chuckled, "That was rash."

Hiruma at once pulled out a gun, "Be straight, fucking old man. You couldn't have come only to ask me about the fucking proposal."

"Okay, okay, don't get furious." Musashi raised his hands, "Let me just ask you a question, Hiruma. Is Anezaki the most lovely, kind-hearted, considerate woman you have ever met?"

"Yes MAX!"

"No, I'm not asking you, Monta. "

"I guess Hiruma has the answer in his mind. You don't have to make him say it..." Kurita tried to prevent the visit from becoming a trial as the atmosphere was getting weird.

"Fine, you don't have to answer." Musashi gave in as Hiruma stared at him in deadly silence, "But I'm sure you know how popular she is among her students and colleagues. And on that day, her co-workers, including the headmaster will attend your wedding with a very high expectation on Anezaki's ' boyfriend since high school', hoping to see what a decent man she's married to. But they're just, wrong."

"What we want to tell you is, Hiruma, those are just ordinary people so don't scare the hell out of them with your firearms." Kurita advised timidly.

Musashi agreed, "Don't lash out with no reason. You don't want Anezaki to lose her job because of you. Just let her guests go home thinking that they attended a wedding instead of a weapon exhibition."

"Why isn't Hurma-san talking at all?" Sena murmured.

Just then, Hiruma jumped up, "Done fucking talking, grandma?" he suddenly pull out another rifle from nowhere, "Just quit messing with my fucking wedding. You're the fucking best man doesn't mean you are the one to tell me what to do."

Musashi shrugged, "Okay, pretend I never came... Oh, about the decorations, how do you like the theme ' heaven and hell'? It suits you."

Hiruma thought for a moment, "I like ' the groom and the broom' better."

Guess they're both fully prepared for the big day!

Omake 2: How Other Couples Prepared for Their Weddings

Koutatou & Julie:

"So, Akaba, _this_ is the band you arranged for our wedding?" Julie asked suspiciously.

"Sure, and you know these two." Akaba answered proudly, "The band's name is Blood. Guitarist, me. Dancer, Mizumachi. New dancer, Taki. Among all the people I've met in high school, these two are the only ones that suits my musicianship the best. I'm sure we're going to be a hit!" He adjusted his glasses confidently.

"Yeah, we're the best!" Mizumachi cheered.

"Oh, can you please put your shirt back on..."

"Ah-ha-ha, don't worry, mademoiselle!"

"No, I'm not worried..." Julie covered her face with her hands, "Oh, by the way, where are the wine samples you brought?"

Akaba answered, "I thought it would be inconvenient for the band to perform with bottles in our hands so I put them all in your front yard."

"You _what_?" And before Julie knew it, a loud "SMART!" came from outside and was followed by a serious of equally loud smashes.

"Koutarou, you moron!" Julie rushed to the door. But Koutarou was the first to open it as he cried, "Why didn't you tell me the bottles weren't empty?!"

Rui & Megu:

As mentioned in Chapter 1, there was never a wedding so there was never any preparation.

Marco & Maria:

"Okay, we have to decide it today. Who will be the best man, Gaou or Kisaragi?" Marco pat his forehead with his palms, biting a pencil.

Maria also seemed uncertain, "They both deserve this. And sure they're capable for the job... I can't decide."

"I need some cola to clear my mind." Marco grabbed another bottle of cola from his mini fridge under the desk. And when the bottle turned empty, he circled the name "Kisaragi".

"But why, Marco? Gaou is as good as..."

Marco crossed Gaou's name and said, "Considering the safety of our rings..."

"I get it." Maria sighed, "Let me take a look at the menu."

And Marco handed her the menu he drafted.

"Wedding cake, cola-flavored. Chocolate, cola-flavored. Salad, cola-flavored. Marshmallow, cola-flavored... Never mind, just tell me which one is not cola-flavored on this list."

Marco raised his head and thought for a moment, "Vanilla-flavored coke, I guess."

Taka & Karin:

Take entered Karin's drawing room, stunned.

"Wow, I thought I needed to hire an army of designers to do the decorating and stuff. But now you've done it all yourself!" He was completely overwhelmed by the beauty of the main portrait in which both of them stood face to face, looking into each other's eyes.

"So graceful... Karin, you're one genius artist!"

Karin was still painting an even bigger one on a ladder, with a bucket filled with water next to her to wash her paintbrushes.

She said, "I think you you should have a haircut before the wedding. It's obviously too long." She sounded like she had never heard Taka's praise for her which got him pretty upset. And the word "haircut" made that feeling even worse.

"No way I"m cutting my hair. It's as precious as my eyes!"

"But don't you think it's way too long? I feared that you might even get tripped over."

"No way that's gonna happen and no way I'm cutting my hair."

That attitude actually got Karin quite disturbed since she was concentrating so hard on her drawing. She quickly turned around to persuade him but accidentally hit the water bucket with her elbow and it fell from the ladder...

"Watch out, Taka!"

Taka swiftly "skywalked" and reached for the bucket but suddenly he lost his balance and...

"Are you okay?" Karin asked anxiously.

"Thanks to my catching skills, I got it." Taka was lying on the floor with the bucket in his hands, not a drop was wasted. "But I tripped over my own hair... I guess I really need a haircut after all."

Sena & Suzuna:

"Best man, Riku. Maid of honor, Mamo-neechan." Suzuna read slowly as she went over their wedding plan. "Do you think we should give the Devil Bats the first two rows? I mean, let them just sit with our families since we're just like a family. Right, Sena?"

But Sena didn't seem to be paying attention.

"Sena? Why are you talking to yourself?"

"What? Oh, sorry... I was, I was going over the whole process of the ceremony. So your dad is going to bring you out. And then we light the unity candle?"

"No, we do the pledge and then we light the candle."

"God, I am going to be so nervous..."

"You're nervous enough now, Sena."

Sena buried his head in his arms, "What if I did something wrong?"

"Just calm down, look into my eyes and quit thinking about other stuff."

"What if I got up late?" Sena asked grimly.

"Set the alarm, and use the 'Ya-ha' ring tone."

"The one by you or by Hiruma-san?"

"You-nii of course. I'm not sure if mine really works."

----------------------------------------

Back in the shop.

"Mamo-neechan you look like an elegant swan!"

"Yep, this one is flawless." Karin said.

But Mamori wasn't so sure, "Whatever I wear he's gonna say, 'Hey, giant duck coming through.' I have no expectations although this dress is fine enough."

----------------------------------------

That night, on the phone.

"Bring a few fire extinguishers," Musashi ordered, "and put them near Agon... But I'm not sure if he'll cooperate... Okay, put one next to Kid. He's fast enough to react if Hiruma really pulls out his weapons."

"But Musashi, " Kurita said, "what if Hiruma finds out? He's going to be so angry..."

"Anger is not that life-threatening. Just remember, Kurita, you can never be too careful when it comes to Hiruma Youichi."


	3. Chapter 3: The Wedding

3. The Wedding

The night before the wedding, at Musashi's.

"Okay, listen up, people!" Musashi pointed at a map on the wall, "This is the vertical view of the church."

"To prevent Hiruma from starting a fire, we placed a total of 13 fire extinguisher's in the guests' seats. See these spots? That's where they will be." Kurita explained.

"And, " Musashi added, "I also placed 4 hidden shower heads on the ceilings, controlled by a remote. So if a fire breaks out, we have at least two ways to put it out. Yeah, the shower is a back-up plan in case Hiruma threatens the fire extinguishers... You never know." Musashi sighed.

The room was in complete silence as all the Devil Bats carefully observed the map. At last, Jumonji said in a very serious tone, "That's very thoughtful of you, old man."

The next day, 2 hours before the wedding.

"You-nii will be so excited when he sees you, Mamo-neechan." Suzuna stared at a fully dressed Mamori, "Even I want to marry you!"

"Now that's just too much, Suzuna..." Mamori smiled faintly, "Oh, why isn't anyone coming yet?"

"I'll go check, Mamo-neechan, I think I can hear some noise outside. Don't try to peek, Mamo-neechan, save your pose on the stage till the last moment!"

So Suzuna went outside, but the place was still empty.

"Well, it seems that no one is here yet." She sighed.

A voice came from a far corner, "Suzuna-chan?"

Suzuna immediately turned around, "Ishimaru-san?! I... I didn't, well, how long have you been here?"

"A few minutes, I saw you came out from the dressing room just now." He replied.

"You did?!" But she didn't notice him at all.

30 minutes before the wedding, most guests were seated.

"This is the wedding of the century," An enthusiastic and familiar voice came from the crowd, "who would have thought the Angel of Deimon would at last marry the most fearsome man in all the worlds! Even the church building is in staggering paleness! Who wouldn't say this is the marriage of heaven and hell! Alas, my friends! Now, behold the wedding!"

"I think they are starting to regret having invited you, Sanada..." It was "Bomberhead" Kumabukuro, next to "Machine Gun" Sanada.

"I should have just went screwing with some chicks," Agon lied on the couch, occupying the seats of other guests, "Instead, I came to this trash's wedding, and is surrounded by these ugly red cans."

"But you came anyway." Unsui said, "You do want to come, Agon."

"Cut the crap..."

Just then, Marco, who sat a row before the Kongo brothers, rose and asked, "Wanna make a bet?"

"What bet?" Jumonji asked. Other guests, including the Devil Bats, were also attracted by the bet.

"It's Hiruma's wedding, so we might as well make a bet about him." Marco grinned. "Hiruma will say the f-word on his wedding, true or false?"

"True MAX!" Monta quickly answered, "Hiruma-san won't be Hiruma-san without the f-word!" He then placed his bet on yes, "500 yan!"

"The monkey's right." So the ha-ha brothers also placed their bets.

It seemed that all the other guests had the same idea.

But Marco didn't look disturbed. Then Musashi came by.

"Hey, Musashi." Marco called, "What do you think? You know Hiruma the best."

Musashi took a serious look at all the money piled up on the yes side and announced, "I'm betting on no."

That shocked everyone.

"Why, Musashi-san?" Sena asked.

Musashi smiled, "Hiruma does have a bad mouth, but he also does care about Anezaki. He won't mess up this time, I'm sure. Before or after the wedding, yes, but during the wedding, no. I have faith in him. He is the one who really cares about what the wedding comes out to be. Trust me, he won't say that word." And he placed his bet on the no side.

"Agree MAX!" Monta seemed very deeply touched, "Hiruma-san won't say it!"

"That was quick..." Sena sweat-dropped. "Devilbat Ghost Placing-the-Bet-on-NO!" He was even faster than Monto to change his mind.

"A-ha-ha, gentleman Hiruma for sure!" You know who said this.

Soon, the money piled up on no, leaving the yes side empty. But some guests still haven't placed their bets yet, including Marco.

"Well, it seems that the ones who are not sure about this are all quarterbacks." Marco was right, Takami, Kid, Unsui, and himself were still outsiders.

"I'll bet on yes!" A strange voice came from the very front row. Sena and Monta went up to find a videophone placed on the couch.

"It's Lewis! Just can't miss the brat's wedding!" It was Clifford, from all the way across the world.

"So, " Marco quickly took out a note, "how much?"

"5000 dollars on yes, he will say it."

"Amazing!" Marco remarked, "I guess I agree with him." And he placed his bet.

30 seconds before the wedding.

Hiruma stood chewing his gum. The door at the end of the aisle suddenly flipped open. There was Mamori with her arm round her father's,

She at once noticed his gum, but she couldn't say anything so she signaled to Hiruma, "Get, rid, of, your, gum!"

But Hiruma ignored and signaled back, "Good, to, see, you, Miss, Duckling."

Mamori almost screamed in her mind, "Father, is, a, pilot, with, sharp, eyes. Gum, disappear, now!" But 2 seconds later, she added, "Secretly..."

And before they knew it, the minster started talking, "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to unite Hiruma Youichi and Anezaki Mamori in holy matrimony in the presence of friends and family. Who gives this woman away?"

"Her mother and I." Mamori's father answered, then he released her and kissed her on her cheeks, "I love you, sweetie."

"Up to now, it's a normal wedding." Kurita said, "But here comes the most..."

"Shut up, fatty! We are trying to listen!" The ha-ha brothers turned around in anger.

And the minster continued, "Do you, Hiruma Youichi, take this woman to be your wife? Do you promise to love, honor and cherish her for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?

This was the first time Hiruma would open his mouth (god knows how he got rid of the gum) in front of the guests, and all the eyes were on him, nervously waiting.

"I," Hiruma began.

"God bless us he won't say it!" Sena secretly prayed.

"Hiruma, it's also Anezaki's wedding, don't screw it up..." Standing next to Hiruma, Musashi can hear his own heartbeats.

"No, please don't say it. NO!" Kurita's lips trembled.

Hiruma didn't look any different as he continued, "fucking do."

The minster was quite shocked but managed to remain calm, and he turned to Mamori, "Ah, Ahen... Do you, Anezaki Mamori, take this man to be your husband? Do you promise to love, honor and cherish him for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?"

Roaring at Hiruma in her imagination, Mamori gently replied, "I do."

Musashi took a deep breath and thought, "Okay, you've said it... Now I should be focusing on other issues... Such as your hidden weapons."

He was lost in thoughts before the minster repeated the phrase "The ring please." for the 3rd time.

"Sorry..." As Musashi handed the ring to Hiruma, he can somehow sense Hiruma yelling, "You shall not see the sunrise of the coming day, fucking old man!"

"Repeat after me..." The minster once again turned to Hiruma, "With this ring. As a sign of my love and affection. I thee wed."

"With this fucking ring." As Hiruma repeated the words, he put the ring on Mamori's finger, "As a sign of my love and affection. I thee wed."

"That was very sweet of you to repeat exactly as what the minster had said, Youichi..." Mamori said softly as she took a closer look at her ring, "Why is there a 'Ya-Ha' carved on my ring?"

And before long, it was time to light the unity candle.

Musashi winked at Sena right away meaning, "Get ready before the fire breaks out!"

And Sena immediately unfold the map, "I think they are ready..."

"Now we will have the lighting of the unity candle." The minster announced.

It only took Hiruma a fraction of a second to take out his arsenal of firearms from nowhere and at the same time aim at the comparatively tiny unity candle.

Boom!

"Fire!" Someone shouted.

Musashi searched for red objects in the crowd but only to find Kid shrugging as if saying, "It doesn't work, sorry."

But there is a Plan B. Musashi took out his remote and... It didn't work.

The flames rapidly raced up to the ceiling.

"Youichi, what are you doing?!" Mamori shouted.

Hiruma let out a wild laughter, "Don't try to stop me. Hey, fucking minster, cut that fucking coward look on your face and do your job!"

The minster turned to him, terrified, "But, but the fire..."

"Just fucking continue!"

"Okay, okay... Everyone! By the authority that is in me, I now pronounce these two husband and wife. You may kiss the bride!"

"Very good!" Hiruma grinned and held Mamori's hand, "I've been waiting for this fucking moment for a long time... Don't you resist." He leaned toward her.

Mamori stared at him, his face reflected the feverish red color of the fire, she bet her face did too. "Youichi," Surprisingly, she seemed even calmer, "I can't believe this is how my wedding turns out... But, it doesn't matter now." And she surrendered to Hiruma's burning lips.

"That's just fascinating!" Clifford yelled in the videophone, "And the place is burning like hell!"

"Yeah," Somehow Hiruma just heard it, "it's hell's wedding." He walked up and turned the videophone off. "See yah!"

Then he held Mamori by her wrist and said, "Let's run before this place turns into ash!"

"Turns into what?"

"Ya-Ha!" But Hiruma was way too excited to hear her as they ran down the aisle under everyone's eyes.

"Youichi, where are we going?" She asked as the gate of the church locked behind them.

Hiruma didn't answer and took out a tiny remote from nowhere, "Trying to sabotage my wedding, huh?" He pressed the botton on the remote.

In the meantime, the 4 hidden shower heads that Musashi fitted up along with like fifty more started spraying water from all corners of the church at the same time.

"Youichi, what did you do?"

"Nothing."

"Yes, you did, what's this remote for?"

"Just press the fucking botton."

So she did.

"Ya-Ha!" Hiruma grabbed the remote from her hand and shouted to the tiny microphone on the back. His voice was transferred to this certain loudspeaker which the people in the church didn't remember having.

"Enjoying a little shower now, huh? Fucking old man, you LOST! Ehehehe... We're going to hell now, fucking thanks for coming to my wedding!"

Inside the church, Musashi, wet.

"I know I shouldn't have underestimated him... Oh, well." He smiled, "Nice wedding."

* * *

"Wow, you bought a bar counter?" Arriving at their new house, Mamori screamed in amazement, "You never told me about this!"

"Yeah, I bought it with a little fucking extra money I made today."

"Today? What else did you do today other than almost destroying the church?"

Hiruma walked to the bar and sat on a stool, "They made a fucking bet today. And blah-blah-blah." He told the story to Mamori.

"So it was your plan all along?" Mamori said helplessly.

Hiruma nodded and handed her a glass of cocktail, "With the fucking eyebrow to play along, it was fucking easy."

"So the two of you shared the money?"

"Nah, he fail to con any of the fucking quarterbacks... It's fucking good that they never placed their bets, except Lewis..."

"But Musashi is going to be so mad..."

"No, he ain't... That fucking old man wanted to screw with my wedding, that was only the revenge."


	4. Chapter 4: The First Night

4. The First Night

**"Ya-Ha! Fucking telephone call!"**

"Get the fucking phone!" Hiruma yelled from the bathroom.

"Stop yelling like that! I'm running to it... Yes?" Mamori picked up the phone, "Hey, dad!"

-----------------------

"My father called." Mamori said, lying on the sofa when Hiruma came out from the shower.

"And you're fucking telling me this because?"

Mamori giggled, "Why are you so suspicious?"

"Just fucking tell me why he called." While he was saying this, Hiruma held both of Mamori's legs up, sat on the place where her legs had been and put her legs on his laps.

"Well, "Mamori explained as she turned on the stereo, "he told me how wonderful the wedding had been today and they really enjoyed it. But, "She paused, which once again caught Hiruma's attention, "he asked if you can at least remind him to take an umbrella next time."

Hiruma frowned, "Next time? Are you fucking getting married again?"

"I meant similar occasions!" She threw a cushion at him. But Hiruma caught it with ease.

"It's fucking 11 o'clock." He suddenly said.

Mamori glanced at the Devil Bat clock hanging on the wall, "Yeah, so?"

"Are you fucking tired?"

"No.

"Do you want a fucking drink?"

"No."

"Are you going to fucking lie here forever?"

"I guess..." Mamori couldn't help laughing out loud, "Stop teasing, Youichi..."

Hiruma didn't say a word, instead, he slowly changed his position.

"Don't creep like this, Youichi." Mamori sat up and held his shoulders when he was already above her, almost coming down for her lips. "You know, we actually have a bed... And it's big enough for two." She quickly stood up and walked to their bedroom.

Hiruma smirked.

Mamori was just at the door when five long fingers firmly held her waist.

"Only 2 meters from our bed and you decided to do it here?"

"I'll do it wherever I fucking like..." Hiruma's tongue gently slid out of his lips and reached for Mamori's...

**"Ya-Ha! Fucking telephone call!" **The sudden ring was also followed by a serious of recorded gun shots.

"Fuck..." Hiruma immediately released her and pulled out a gun from his bathrobe. (Yes, bathrobe.)

"Don't... "Mamori stopped him by grabbing the barrel, "I'll go get it. Just wait."

"Hello?" She picked up the phone, "Julie?"

_"Hey! What are you doing now, Mamori?"_

"Now? Umm, watching TV..."

_"TV? That's not what you're supposed to be doing on the first night you get married!"_

"What do you exactly want to know, Julie?"

_"Nothing... I just want to tell you how fascinating your wedding was today. It was hilarious!"_

"Thank you..."

_"It reminded me of mine... Oh, it was so embarrassing! We didn't even have a Best Man! Koutarou said Akaba was the only choice but Akaba had to lead the band! He wouldn't put away his guitar! And stupid Koutarou had to put the ring in his own pocket... His OWN pocket! Do you remember how many combs he threw out before he actually found the ring? 27! Can you imagine? Inside his ONE pocket!"_

"I'm sure he said sorry afterwards."

_"Of course he had to!" _There was another voice shouting, _"Smart bedtime!"_ from the other side of the phone. _"Oh, it's late. Sorry if I had interrupted you... Okay, I'm letting you go now."_

Julie hanged up.

Mamori sighed as she turned around to Hiruma, "I guess the telephone's going to thank me for saving its life, right?" She approached to him. "I was on the phone for 3 minutes and you aren't even shirtless yet?"

Hiruma sneered, "I wasn't even wearing a fucking shirt..." But Mamori was fast enough to stuff his mouth with her kiss while the two started to undress each other in breathtaking speed.

**"Ya-Ha! Fucking telephone call!"**

"FUCK!"

Mamori grumbled, "Again?"

Only on her undies, Mamori managed to save the phone again, "Hello?"

_"Mamori?"_ It was Maria. _"You sound pretty tired."_

"I, I do feel a little tired today... You know, the wedding and stuff. What's up?"

_"Well, nothing. I'm just calling to say thank you. I thought it was ridiculous to take an umbrella on such a fine day but Marco insisted and you know what happened. We were the only ones that came out dry! Then he told me it was your husband who told him to bring an umbrella. Then I became suspicious. I noticed him walking to the other men today but I didn't know what was the chat about. So, do you know anything about this?"_

"Umm, well, I guess he won't tell me why..." Though clear about the bet, Mamori still lied because she thought maybe Marco wanted some handy cash for his experiments. "By the way, how do you like our wedding?"

_"Good, pretty good. A well-done disaster movie. I like it. It reminded me of mine... God, it freaked me out. I thought we were filming 'the Godfather'... Oh, never mind. It's so late, I'm sure he wants you now. Bye!"_

She hanged up before Mamori could say "goodbye".

The couple remained silent for 2 seconds.

"This is fucking annoying..." Hiruma held Mamori sideways and rushed to their bed, "Don't try my patience this time..." He threw her to the bed.

"It wasn't my fault, Youichi."

"Yes, it fucking was. You should have let me destroyed the fucking telephone!" Hiruma said while he crept onto her chest.

"Youichi..." She moaned, satisfied.

Hiruma didn't answer, there was no need to.

"Youichi..."

"WHAT?"

"The curtains are still up!"

"Like I fucking care!" Hiruma completely lost his patience, "Now just fucking shut up!"

"People can see us from the street!"

"Let me tell you why I don't give a fucking crap about this. I placed more than 500 sensors within a 10-meter radius. All connected to an underground cable which can send information directly to my cell and laptop over the wireless. Even if a fly gets in our yard, I would be the first to turn it into dust. Besides, we have Cerberus. Feel fucking secured now?"

Mamori didn't feel secured at all but she would hate to see the night wasted so they went on anyway.

**"Ya-Ha! Fucking telephone call!"**

This time, Hiruma disappeared without a word.

He picked up the phone.

"The fucking telephone rings for one more time and I'll shoot the hell of your fucking ass!"

He almost smashed the receiver when he hanged up.

"Who called?" Mamori asked.

"Like I fucking care... And I disconnected the fucking phone lines."

"You don't know? What if it was..."

"I heard rollers."

With a sighed, Mamori murmured, "Poor thing..."

And finally, they could go on with their busy work without any more interruption.

------------------------------------------------

At the same time, on the other side of the city.

"What happened, Sena? You're pale..." Suzuna asked anxiously.

Sena shook his head, but his lips trembled, "I just called Hiruma-san... But he sounded like he was going to kill me!"

"You're an idiot, Sena!" Suzuna screamed.

Sena looked at her, shocked, "Why?!"

She didn't say anything more but went to bed laughing sweetly, "Idiot..."


	5. Chapter 5: The New Neighbor

5. The New Neighbor

It was an ordinary Sunday afternoon.

Mamori sat next to Hiruma on the couch with her head on his shoulder, reading while Hiruma rubbed off the dust on his guns. Cerberus yawned by her feet.

A truck that drove past their window caught Mamori's eyes, "Looks like we are going to have a new member in our community."

Hiruma didn't say anything.

So Mamori continued, "I think this person will live next to us... You know there's an empty house only a few feet away from our yard."

Hiruma began to rub his guns for the second time.

"When do you think it's the time to visit our new neighbor?" Mamori put away her book and stared at Hiruma for an answer. "Areyou listening, Youichi?"

"Fucking yes."

"Then why are you so silent?"

"Imagine me firing like twenty guns at the same time right next to your ears while you are trying to stuff creampuffs into your huge, huge mouth." He stood up and collected his guns to his very own weapon base.

Mamori frowned as she pat on Cerberus's head, "Done your nap yet?"

"Whumm, humph!" Cerberus sneezed.

"Go out and grab some fresh air." She tickled the dog's ears and then Cerberus trotted out into the backyard.

"What a peaceful afternoon..." She yawned and stretched her body when suddenly...

"Ding-Dong!"

"Coming!" Mamori got up and walked to the door.

"Yes?" As Mamori opened the door, she saw a neatly-dressed young lady, about 23 or 24, standing outside.

The lady had curly brown hair all the way down to her chest, when she bowed, the tip of her hair reached her waist, "Nojima Mannenrou, or you can call me Rosemary. I've just arrived here a few minutes ago!" She had a very natural polite tone in her voice.

"Rosemary, oh, welcome to the neighborhood. Please come inside!" Mamori was so pleased to have a visitor.

"Mrs. Hiruma, right?" Rosemary asked.

"Yeah." Mamori nodded, "I'll go get my husband to meet you." But she suddenly stopped on her way to the entrance of the base, "No, I think I should make you some tea first."

The two girls sat by the table, enjoying the tea.

"So, Rosemary, where are you from?"

"Kyoto, I grew up there. And recently I got a job here in Tokyo as a secretary for the CEO of a certain not-well-known company," She laughed, "so I moved here."

Just then Hiruma suddenly appeared at the corner of the hallway, "What the fuck is..."

"Youichi!" Mamori intentionally shouted out loud to cover the f-word that came out from Hiruma's mouth. "I want you to meet Rosemary here. She's our new neighbor."

Rosemary quickly stood up and bowed, "It's my honor to meet you, Mr. Hiruma!"

"Unn..." Hiruma responded coldly.

Mamori at once noticed the awkward atmosphere so she swiftly moved to the kitchen, "Why don't you stay here for dinner, Rosemary?"

Rosemary was very surprised, "That, that's so nice of you... Why, thank you so much!" She bowed again.

But Hiruma ignored their guest, walked to Mamori, and whispered to her ear, "Are you fucking crazy?"

"For what, inviting a new friend to dinner? You shouldn't be making such a fuss about ordinary social life, Youichi."

Hiruma turned his head away, pissed off.

"Did, did I just smell gun powder?" Rosemary suddenly asked from the living room.

Mamori was numb with shock. She knew the smell came from Hiruma but she was more surprised to find the seemed-fragile girl to be so sensitive about it.

"You should go and take a shower, Youichi. Or you'll ruin the meal." She pushed Hiruma out of the kitchen and explained to Rosemary, "My husband is a weapon maniac. Sorry if that bothers you."

"No, it's fine for me. My father was a policeman so I'm pretty used to have guns around. Actually, I sort of like firearms too."

"Really?" Mamori was even more surprised, "Then I think you two can get along pretty well, as long as you talk about nothing but weapons."

Rosemary chuckled childishly and her silky hair slightly swung. That was when Mamori noticed a mole right next to her left temple. It was obvious that the mole made her look sexier and more mature than she seemed.

Dinner.

"Maybe we should help you with the furniture." Mamori suggested, "It's dangerous for a single girl like you to do all the heavy work."

"It's okay, Mrs. Hiruma." Rosemary said, "I kind of want the house to be a mess so I can have everything within my reach... I'm lazy." She laughed.

Hiruma didn't say anything that night. It might be a good news for Mamori since she had no idea what could possibly come out from his mouth. And since, there was nothing for him to talk about.

-------------------------------------------------

"The meal bored you, didn't it?" Mamori asked. The two were getting ready for bed.

"Fucking annoying." He said.

"What are you talking about, the meal or me?"

"Both." He pulled the lamp. "You were as cheerful as a fucking les..."

"That's too mean, Youichi." Mamori opposed, then she thought for a moment, "Maybe domestic stuff don't suit you that well." She had her arms round his waist and asked, "Do you want kids, Youichi?"

"Why? Are you fucking pregnant?"

"No! I've just had my period... Just asking."

Hiruma turned to her and said, "Whatever."

"I take that as a yes?"

"Just fucking do what you want."

"It's not like I can do this all by myself..." Mamori frowned and turned away.

------------------------------------------------

Next morning.

Mamori had to set out earlier on Mondays. So Hiruma was alone in the house. It was 8 am.

He checked his cell and laptop, nothing from the sensors. So he left too. He walked out of his house and found Rosemary, who was in a typical office suit, reading their morning paper which was supposed to be placed on the floor.

"Mr. Hiruma!" Rosemary fold the paper in haste, "Oh, sorry, I, I haven't checked the news for some days so I just... Sorry. You see, my cable TV and Internet access aren't ready yet. So sorry." She bowed.

"It's nothing..." Hiruma popped his gum, trying to ignore her.

But Rosemary handed him the newspaper apologetically and suddenly something jumped into her mind and she asked, "Mr. Hiruma, I've just got 2 tickets for a weapon exhibition on Friday... Would you, would you like to go?" She stared at Hiruma for an answer, a little frightened.

Hiruma shrugged, looking at some other directions, "Maybe."

"Well, if you want to go, just call me. It, it would be great to have you to keep my company!" She bowed.

"Okay, I'll tell you later."

Rosemary nodded happily but suddenly, her body shaked a little, "Oh, my god! My boss is coming to pick me up on my first day to work... God, I wish I hadn't kept him waiting for too long. Well, Mr. Hiruma, remember to call me. I've gotta go now! Have a nice day!" And she rushed down the street like an antelope.

Hiruma's eyes followed her until she disappeared at the corner of the street. The street was quiet, completely quiet, for all morning.

Hiruma blinked and unfold the morning paper and quickly checked the headlines: Swine flu, economic crisis, drug dealers on the run, car accident... Nothing special.

He threw the paper into the bin and walked away.

Maybe a new neighbor wasn't _that_ boring after all.


	6. Chapter 6: The Signs

6. The Signs

That night, in bed.

"Rosemary told me about the exhibition today." Mamori said, "So, are you going?"

Hiruma bit his lower lip, "Are you giving fucking orders?"

"No..." Mamori smiled, "I just thought maybe you should..."

"Go with her?" Hiruma interrupted, "Sane women never let their husbands go out with strange girls, _alone_. If I had 2 fucking tickets, I'd rather throw the other one away than going with some 'neighbors'..."

"But you want to go, don't you?"

Hiruma found it hard to deny.

"It's like going to the museum, or some galleries. It's totally fine, Youichi. You don't have to..."

"Fine, I'll fucking go."

Mamori sighed, "You should have just said yes at the very beginning." Then she moved closer and kissed the back of his neck, "It's been a whole week since we last..."

"I've been waiting all night for your fucking request..." Hiruma quickly turned around and gave her a long, passionate kiss...

-------------------------------------

Next morning, Hiruma turned on the secret camera which hid under their mailbox and waited.

"Youichi, I'm leaving!" Mamori called from the door.

"Have a fucking good day!" He replied without turning his face away from the screen.

5 minutes passed, 10 minutes, 20 minutes... Finally, the target appeared.

Hiruma rushed out of the house just in time to meet Rosemary.

"Hey, fucking neighbor!" He shouted, "2 pm, Friday, I'll pick you up right here!"

Rosemary was in complete shock for at least 10 seconds until she screamed, "Is that true, Mr. Hiruma? Oh, thank you!" She bowed, "Thank you so much!"

What happened then was like a clone of yesterday: Rosemary found out that she was late, and ran down the street. Hiruma watched her until she disappeared. The street was silent all through the morning.

Hiruma walked back to his monitor room and sighed. A strange feeling was filling his heart... It was so exciting and addictive that he believed he had never experienced this before... It was like someone tickling his heart...stirring his craziness...

"It's going to fucking break her heart for sure..." He muttered to himself, "But too bad, I just can't fucking help it..." Then he turned on his laptop.

------------------------------------

Friday, 2 pm.

Rosemary showed up in front of Hiruma's car.

T-shirt, shorts, trainers... Hiruma checked her out behind his sun-Gs. It was the first time he had ever seen her wearing something other than an office suit. Rosemary was indeed hot.

"So, are we leaving now?"

"Just get in the car." Hiruma answered, "And buckle up, fucking neighbor."

------------------------------------

The exhibition was kind of disappointing. So in less than half an hour, Hiruma and Rosemary found themselves at the exit of the building.

"Sorry, Mr. Hiruma. But would you excuse me for a second. I have to go to the toilet." Rosemary said.

"Okay." Hiruma then walked to a dustbin and spit his gum into it. He leered around and thought,"I'd better not be seen here..."

------------------------------------

For the next two months, Hiruma frequently left the house on working days. He always left after Mamori so she had no idea that he had been skipping work. And sometimes, he said he had overtime work and often returned around midnight. But Mamori didn't smell a rat at all. All she knew was that Hiruma had finally found a friend of the same line. He sometimes talked about Rosemary but the speech was usually plain as a piece of paper. Mamori never, ever, found it suspicious.

Until that night.

Midnight, Mamori was aroused by a voice in the living room.

It was Hiruma.

He seemed to have been on the phone, for, at least 10 minutes. Mamori thought. Who could it be?

So she got up, walked to the door of their bedroom and reached for the knob...

But Hiruma was the first to swing the door open. His eyes was emotionless. It frightened Mamori, really, it did.

"Why aren't you in bed?" He asked.

She asked weakly, "Who, who called?"

"Wrong number." The answer was cold as ice.

Astonished, Mamori turned around and tried to look into his eyes. But he didn't even raise his head.

A wrong number took you 10 minutes? She thought. Impossible!

Hiruma sensed the uneasiness in her so he said, as if ruffled, "Get fucking back in bed."

It was not a suggestion or a request, Mamori thought, it was without a doubt a command...

She remained awake the rest of the night.

-------------------------------------

The next day, Mamori got home early on purpose.

A card lied on the table, saying, "Youichi, it has been 100 days since we got married in the presence of friends and family. Though I seemed opposed when you purposed... But until this day, I have not regretted my choice. I love you, Youichi, as always. Your wife, Mamori."

She placed the card on their dining table this morning. But it remained where it was. He didn't seem to have found it.

"Youichi?" Almost hopeless, Mamori called from the hallway, "Are you home, Youichi?"

No answer.

"Maybe he's in the base?" So she made her way down to his base.

Inside was dark and quiet. Nobody was there. But Mamori, as if driven by curiosity, walked into the depth of the base.

A familiar smell ran into her nose. Was is gun powder? No, it smelt like something else, something that existed in nature... What could it be?

She searched the name of the smell in her brain... Thinking had never been so terrifying to her before. She was scared, scared to know the answer but the process was already unstoppable.

The second she realized what the smell was, her heart was torn into pieces as she uttered in tears, "Rosemary..."


	7. Chapter 7: The Break Out

7. The Break Out

The late returns, the midnight phone call, and, the secret person who had been in his base... Everything pointed to the same answer.

"Youichi... How could you possibly, possibly do this to me... We made a promise... " Mamori's heart was shattered into pieces as she sat slumped on their bed. "How ironic! The woman I considered a friend stole my man... I must look like a fool... Youichi, you lied to me... For once but it's enough!" Tears left two long, painful trails on her cheeks. "Youichi..." She threw herself to bed in a complete breakdown.

-----------------------------------

Hiruma returned and found the door open-Mamori had forgotten to close the door when she found the card unmoved.

He walked into their bedroom and found Mamori packing up.

"What the fuck are you..."

"Don't ask, you should have never asked me to marry you at the first place..."Still sobbing, Mamori snapped down the lid of the box, "I'm out of here." And she walked past him with out looking.

"He didn't even stop me... He didn't even ask why..." Desperated, Mamori made her way to the door.

Hiruma only followed silently.

Then Mamori stopped and turned around. Youichi, I'm giving you one last chance. She thought.

"Tell me, Youichi, tell me what you're hiding from me.." She was afraid to look at him in the eye.

Hiruma stood like a statue. He took a deep breath, turned his face away and said, "I'm fucking sorry..."

BANG!

The door was shut closed.

Crying, Mamori left the house. She couldn't believe her marriage ended in 100 days. "For 5 years, you have always..." She couldn't bear even thinking about the past. "Why... Youichi..."

She caught a taxi and headed for the Kobayakawa's.

------------------------------------

"You-nii is, is having an affair?!" Suzuna was so stunned that she almost dropped the cup she was holding.

"No way this could happen!" Sena shouted in disbelief, "Hiruma-san would never, ever do something like that!"

"It's not like You-nii at all... Is there a mistake, Mamo-neechan?" Suzuna asked.

Mamori shook her head, "I called his workplace and confirmed that he had been frequently skipping work for the past 2 months. And if there was a mistake, I wouldn't be here... He just watched me leave the house without any explanation."

"That sounds so, weird..." Sena said, "Maybe we'll get Musashi-san to call him and..."

"Don't, Sena..." Mamori stopped him, "It's no use... If he had anything to say, he would have said it." She stood up and left the table, "I need a shower to cool down..."

------------------------------------

Back in the house, Hiruma sat on the couch, typing. He checked the clock, it was 5 pm.

He got up and started to remove everything that belonged to Mamori, everything that she loved: Her teacup set, her books, her creampuff coupons, her wedding dress and, her card on the table... He packed all these things up and took them down to his base. They were put away in a corner.

Then Hiruma dialled a number.

"Hey, fucking neighbor." He said, "Do you have time for dinner tonight? Yeah, at my house. Okay, I'll be waiting."

He hanged up.

Cerberus was pacing around the empty house. He seemed to have found the mistress gone. Hiruma whistled. "Be ready at the door now... I'll need you any minute, Cerberus."

------------------------------------

While Mamori was in the shower, her cell phone rang.

Suzuna answered it, "Hello?"

_"Is that Mrs. Hiruma? This is a call from the hospital."_

"No, but she's busy now, so it's fine to talk to me. What's wrong?"

Sena watched Suzuna's facial expression changing from cloudy to sunny, and sunny to cloudy again. He asked when she hanged up, "What's the matter?"

"It sure isn't a good time but Mamo-neechan is pregnant."

Thanks to Suzuna's popularity, by sunset, all the girls had gathered in her house.

"What will you do if you found out that your husband cheated on you?" Suzuna asked.

Julie was the first to answer, "I would shave his head bald and burn all his combs."

"I would turn around and walk away without a word..." (Marco: Yeah, I've been there.)Maria was next, "You, Karin?"

"Why, I, I don't know!" This question was never on her list.

Megu was a rare guest but she came anyway. "I would scrape the bitch's face first, and then poke his eyes, break his arms... And at last, smash his balls flat..."

"Why don't you just be straight and kill him..." Suzuna remarked. (Rui: Man, I didn't fuckin' do nothing!)

"What about you, Suzuna?" Megu asked.

"Me? I would trace two long, deep marks on his spine with my rollers..."

"Your husband is listening..." Julie reminded her.

They all became silent again.

"They were good together... Envied by us all but now... It has only been 3 months..." Karin suddenly felt like weeping.

"This is so crazy, Hiruma wouldn't do something like that." Megu said, "It's so fuckin' not like him."

"But he would have called us by now if he was really innocent..." Suzuna sighed, "How could he not know where Mamo-neechan is right now?"

"You're right..." Maria said, "She needs a lawyer more than a traitor's call right now."

"She's right." A voice came from the back, it was Mamori. She had been listening the whole time.

Suzuna quickly rose, "No... No, Mamo-neechan, you can't be leaving You-nii when... When you're pregnant..."

"Oops, it's even more complicated than I thought." Julie covered her mouth and muttered.

Just then, Mamori's cell rang again.

This time she answered it herself. It was Musashi, _"Hey, is Hiruma with you? I called your house but you guys seemed to be out and he didn't answer his phone so... Well, I just want to ask if he has time for a drink tonight. Is he with you, Ane... Oh, sorry, I still couldn't get rid of the old name."_

"No, Musashi... He's not here... And I wish my name was still Anezaki instead of Hiruma..." She hanged up before Musashi could ask anything.

Everyone fell into deep silence again. These two are definitely over.

-----------------------------------------------

Dinnertime.

Rosemary sat opposite to Hiruma, nervously eating.

"Where, where is Mrs. Hiruma?" She asked.

"She found out about us, gone before 5."

Rosemary was shocked, "But, but what did we do?"

"Don't lie to me, fucking neighbor, or to yourself." Hiruma leaned closer and handed her a glass of wine, "You like me, don't you?"

Rosemary's mouth was half-open for a few seconds before she said "Did I just ruined your marriage?"

"I don't give a fucking crap about my marriage... I'm just so fucking interested in you, fucking neighbor."

"Well, Mr. Hiruma... I have to admit that I kind of like you... But I never thought that you would leave your wife for, for me..."

"I didn't fucking leave her, that lousy woman left me." Hiruma then put down his glass and rose, "Go and take a shower now, fucking neighbor. Just wear her fucking bathrobe. I'll wait for you in the bedroom."

"Don't, don't you think it's too soon, Mr. Hiruma?" Rosemary asked uncomfortably.

Hiruma smirked, "There's no such thing as 'too soon' or 'too late' if we are both fucking desirous to do so..."

Rosemary blushed and got up. "Well... If you don't mind, why would I?"

-------------------------------------------------

Hiruma waited outside the bathroom door. He could hear Rosemary humming a song, happily.

He checked his cell phone and laptop again. Everything was working normally.

Rosemary soon finished her shower and came out. But Hiruma was nowhere to be found.

Suddenly, a long arm rounded her waist. "I miss you so much, fucking neighbor." All of a sudden, Hiruma showed his most fearsome laughter, "And, I also miss your fucking heroin." He pointed a gun to her spine. "Nojima Mannenrou, oh, no, it should be Shimata Risako, aka 'Chick', one of the most wanted drug kingpins in Japan. But you know what, you fucking suck as a criminal for not knowing that nobody has ever succeeded in lying to Hiruma Youichi."


	8. Chapter 8: The Logic

8. The Logic

Rosemary stood still like a statue.

"You were _almost_ fucking right about one thing, bitch." Hiruma said, "You _almost _ruined my marriage. You owe a fucking apologize to her. And you think that's really her fucking bathrobe you're wearing? It's just a bargain I found at a clearance sale."

In despair, Rosemary uttered, "How, how did you know? I thought my real identity would be a complete mystery..."

"Flat shoes." Hiruma answered.

"What?"

"When you ran down the street on your so-called first day of work, it was quiet as hell. So I noticed that you dressed in a full office suit, except the high heels. Why would an office lady wear flat shoes when she didn't have to press the brake pedal herself? That just pointed out that you weren't the passenger, but the driver. Which means, you lied. The company, the boss, whatever you told, are lies..."

"And the newspaper you read." Hiruma continued, "One of the headlines was about your caught understrappers and their missing head. You left your finger prints all over the area where they printed this story. You weren't just going over the paper but were only concerned about a certain piece of news. So, I figured maybe you have something to do with this."

"Then why did I say yes to the exhibition? Because the ticket was nothing but evidence. I found your print on it and at the same time searched in the government's database, and BINGO, there you were..."

"So, "Rosemary interrupted, "you are a police?"

"Fucking wrong! I"m a full-time hacker. The reason you went to the exhibition was to flush your goods down the toilet, a public toilet. 'Cause if you used your own toilet, it would probably be plugged up and the plumber would be suspicious if he found out why... And why do I know? 'Cause the shorts you wore that day didn't have pockets and your _things_ got smaller when you came out from the toilet. So I'm guessing you stuffed the drug in your bras. You also needed alibi but the police never found out anyway so it's pointless to tell you all these...And your father ain't no police either."

"Well done..." Rosemary said, surrendered, "You're a genius."

"Too late for flattering!" Hiruma pushed the gun harder.

Rosemary bit her lips. But in a second, she smiled and said, "You drove your wife away just to get me... I obviously interested you. Should I be thankful?"

----------------------------------

"This is strange." Musashi said. Everyone was in Sena's house, discussing the matter. "That doesn't sound like Hiruma at all. Maybe he is hiding something but it's not what you think he's hiding from you."

"Musashi-san, I called you here to tell Mamo-neechan what to do... Not trying to persuade her, again." Sena complained.

"But you don't want divorce, do you? With this baby and stuff... You can't just..." Musashi asked.

Mamori looked pale, but calm. In less than 5 hours she had to face the most horrible breakdown of her marriage and to make the hardest decision of her life.

"She needs time, Musashi." Kurita said gently. In fact, everyone felt the same when they heard the news but none of them showed sadness or pity on their faces since, Mamori was the one who had been through the worst. If she was not crying, no one should.

"Maybe you should call him..." Musashi suggested. "Try one more time."

----------------------------------

"That's nothing but bullshit, bitch. _You _drove her away, not me..." Hiruma scolded, "She almost told you everything about our house the first day she met you. You knew I had a secret base perfect for your filthy business, and you knew she hated guns. So you thought why not become the mistress of the house... You tempted me every time we went out and it was fucking disgusting. You always agreed with me and pretended to understand me better than she did. It was your plan all along."

He pushed harder, "You cunning bitch...It took me 2 months not only to make my wife believe that I was having an affair but also to collect actual evidence. Otherwise, there's no point in risking my marriage and breaking her heart."

Then, he whistled.

Cerberus, who lied in their backyard for the whole time, rose and pressed a button on the ground with his paw.

A siren went off right away.

Police officers immediately broke into the house, armed.

"I was sure about who you are the second day I met you. But you were cautious for two months, until yesterday. My secret camera caught you stuffing heroin into the gun barrels in my base, yeah, curious about why I let you into the base?" Hiruma said at last, "Remember to call my wife after you've settled down in your fucking lovely new home. Welcome to jail, Chick."

---------------------------------

Mamori clutched her phone, staring at the dial panel.

Everyone sat and waited for her finger to move to the first number.

Suddenly, the cell phone started to beep so loud that Mamori almost dropped it. "Is that You-nii?" Suzuna asked.

"No... It's..." Mamori used the hands free mode, "Who is it?"

_"Good evening, ma'am. This is Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department calling..."_

-------------------------------------

Hiruma lied on his bed, staring at the ceiling. 6 hours without Mamori... "What kind of fucking so-called efficient police department this is... Can't even finishi a phone call in 2 minutes..." Then he found Cerberus at the doorway.

"You fucking hungry?" He asked.

"Hummph!"

"Fine, I'll make you fucking bacon." He got up and went to the kitchen.

------------------------------------

_"Our gratitude is beyond words. Have a pleasant evening, ma'am."_

"Thank... Thank you." Mamori uttered.

Then the polieman hanged up.

"That was... Dramatic." Sena said.

"I was right."said Musashi, "He wasn't cheating on you, but trying to protect you... He knew there could be danger, that woman probably had weapon on her. He had to kick you out of the house..."

"But... He should have told me the truth..."

"If he told you the truth, will you leave the danger to him and get away for your own good? Of course you wouldn't... That's what he thought." Musashi stated in relief.

Mamori nodded, she felt like crying again.

"Mamo-neechan!" Suzuna suddenly screamed, "Why are you still sitting here? Go home and hug him!"

"Kiss him..." Sena followed.

"And make out with him..." Added Musashi.

Mamori jumped up from the chair and disappeared at the speed of light.

"Impressive..." Sena gasped.

-----------------------------------

Mamori swung open the door and found Hiruma sharing the last piece of bacon with Cerberus.

She couldn't help smiling. "Youichi..." She called tenderly, "I, I'm back..."

"Ummm..." Hiruma gave a glimpse and asked, "Want some fucking bacon?"

"Youichi..." She couldn't do anything but stare at him, "I'm, I'm so sor..." But she couldn't bear it any longer so she ran to him and fell into his long, firm arms...

"I'm so sorry, so sorry... I should have trusted you but your plan was so _damn_ perfect and I thought you were really... Oh, god, did I just said something horrible?"

"No, fucking go on." Hiruma said, enfolding her in a tight embrace.

"Well, I was frustrated and desperate when this doctor suddenly called and told me, well, Suzuna actually, that I... Oh, let's just be straight. Youichi, I'm pregnant."

She looked into his eyes waiting for an astonishing expression to appear.

But all it moved was one third of his left eyebrow, which was quite discouraging for Mamori.

"Fucking well then..." Then he paused for a moment, "You're really fucking sure you don't want any bacon?"

"Stop it, Youichi..." She punched him on the chest and laughed.

"But I'm glad of it, Youichi, I mean, everything that had happened." There were sparkles in her eyes.

And finally, they kissed.

Cerberus finished up the bacon while the two were enjoying themselves... "Hummph!" Who cares what the sound meant...

-----------------------------------

"Hiruma Youichi..." Rosemary muttered, "It's not the end of it yet... I will be back!"

A large police officer got in the police car and hit his butt onto the seat next to her, "Scooch over a little, Miss Terminator." He said calmly.

And the car drove off.


	9. Chapter 9: The Shopping List

9. The Shopping List

"Get up... Youichi..."

Almost 2 months after the _incident_, it was another fine Saturday morning when Mamori tried to drag Hiruma off bed.

"I fucking see that you're more aggressive than before... But it ain't gonna work..." Hiruma opened one eye and peeked at the clock on the wall, "It's fucking 6 in the morning."

"But we need to go shopping. The supermarket will be very crowded after 9 so we must start early."

"Are you out of your fucking minds? It's basic math, 9 minus 6 is 3... 3! We have 3 fucking hours to prepare... Plenty of time... We can even... Fucking do _that_ before we set off."

"You pervert!"

"That was a fucking pervert word you said... I thought you are fucking determined to be the one fucking perfect role-model for the kid."

"Youichi... " Mamori kind of lost her patience, "Are you going or not?"

"The fucking car key is on the table."

"Youichi, you can't let me go alone! I have so many things to buy!"

Hiruma opened his eyes again, "A fucking genius once invented something called a shopping cart..."

"You are not going to let me carry all those things, Youichi. Because the essential thing is..." She paused, "I am already carrying something that's so important to you that you won't dare let anything go wrong..."

"I can't believe you just fucking called the kid a _thing_... Fine, " Hiruma finally got up, "you're just gonna fucking do anything to get me going with you..."

"Just admit you do want to go because you care." Mamori then left the room to get the car key.

"What do you need a fucking juice extractor for?" Hiruma complained as he went over the super-long shopping list Mamori wrote the night before, "And wind-bell? That's a fucking waste of money. Okay, the food list is fucking rational enough but dragon fruit?! Since when did you suddenly like fucking dragon fruit?"

"A pregnant woman's taste changes in very unpredictable ways. So, get over it, Youichi." Mamori explained when she got the list back from Hiruma, "Okay, I'll go get the food. And yes, the cart goes with me. Get the extractor, Youichi, and look for me in the food section." She finished with a peck on Hiruma's face, "See yah, darling."

Mamori seemed to be a lot more active and cheerful ever since she found out she was pregnant. Which was, unusual. Hiruma kind of enjoyed her being so jumpy now. But sometimes, he was worried, well, maybe not really worried but more like jealous. He knew the kid would take up a lot of their time, especially Mamori's time, which used to belong to him. But, just like what Mamori had said, he would have to "get over it".

"Fuck..." He murmured.

"Still can't watch your mouth even when you're alone, right, Hiruma?"

The tall, slim figure of Takami appeared in front of him.

"Fucking glasses? Why are you fucking here?"

"You just stole my question, Hiruma. But, oh well... Congratulations to the new member if I am not mistaken!"

"Not fucking arrived yet... And you haven't answered my question, fucking glasses."

Takami smiled as he adjusted his glasses, "I'm looking for a whisk."

"Since when did you fucking started to stir eggs? Trying to invent a new formation called _Ballistir_?"

"It's Shin... He asked me to get him a whisk... You know he likes cooking."

Hiruma looked at him, skeptically, "Right..."

"Peanut butter, check. Onions, check. Dragon fruit, check... And the next thing is... Wow!" Suddenly, her shopping cart hit a petite girl who was bending down to reach for a bag of flour. "Oh, my god, I am so sorry!" She walked up to the girl and... "Wakana-chan?"

"Ma, Mamori?!"

"It's been such a long time since, well, my wedding..." Mamori was surprised.

Wakana was also shocked to see her, "I haven't even congratulated you on your... Ahhh, it's so good to see you here!"

"Are you looking for flour?" Mamori asked as she grabbed a bag of flour for herself.

Wakana nodded, "I'm learning to make a strawberry cake!"

When Hiruma found Mamori trapped in the dilemma of yellow or green pepper, Wakana had already left.

"I just saw fucking glasses."

"Really? And I just saw Wakana-chan!"

The two looked at each other for a second, in complete silence.

"They're dating." Hiruma announced.

"But it might also be a coincidence. Why can't two people who know each other show up in the same department store at the same time for a different reason?"

Hiruma rolled his eyes and said, "He was looking for a whisk for Shin."

"Still, not relevant."

"It ain't just ordinary whisk... He was looking for a fucking _electric_ whisk."

Mamori's eyes widened, "But Shin can't use an electric whisk..."

"So, they're dating."

"What are you going to do? Catch them making out?"

"No, I'll make them confess unconsciously." Hiruma smirked, "That fucking glasses is going to regret lying tome."

"There you are, Youichi, that same evil face..."

Omake 3: How Other Couples Shopped

Koutarou & Julie:

Julie would always regret going to the canned food section that day when Koutarou happened to see a can tower which was perfectly built in the shape of a pyramid. But the hardworking laborer seemed to have forgotten to put just one more can on the top as the peak. And, Julie happened to be holding a can of soft drink... And so...

"SMART!"

Julie never dared to shop there again. And a falling can tower became a part of her nightmares ever since.

Rui & Megu:

"Could you add a soft pad onto the motor?" Megu asked the auto worker.

"Sure, but would it be a little too high? I mean, it's going to be a little uncomfortable when you drive..." The guy said.

"High? I'm okay with height. But I would not be driving."

The guy looked at her, puzzled. "So it's your husband that does the driving?"

"Yeah."

"I'm afraid he's going to hate this when he sits on it." The guy was pretty frank about this since Megu was a frequent customer.

"Him? No, he won't be sitting on the pad."

"But isn't he the one that does the driving?"

"Well, not really driving. _I_ will be the one that sits on the pad and he will be the one that does the _carrying_..."

Just then, Rui came by to pick her up with his racing car.

The auto worker looked at Rui with a strange face. Rui found the expression on his face quite humiliating but couldn't explain why.

Marco & Maria:

While other women get headaches from trying to come up with a place where they can _store_ their husbands when they are shopping, Maria always knows where to leave Marco before she sets off.

"Got a new flavor on sell, enough to take up a few hours, huh?" Maria glanced at the neatly displayed row of cola bottles, "Have a good time, honey."

As soon as Maria left, Marco took out a syringe. "I've finally figured out a way to take samples without even opening the bottle..." He said to himself proudly.

He got caught by the security guard 10 seconds later.

Taka & Karin:

They shop for very pleasant things such as books, drawing pencils and picture frames...

"Is it true that you would finish every book once you started reading it?" Karin asked.

"Yeah, I guess..."

"No matter what kind of book it is?"

"I don't think that what matters." Taka answered confidently.

"Even very unpleasant books?"

"Such as?"

Karin blushed and took out her cell phone, "Hercules-san accidentally sent me a message that was supposed to be sent to you..." She showed him the text:

_Have you found the Playboy magazine I hid in your bookshelf? Karin will never find out, hahaha!_

Sena & Suzuna:

Suzuna loves going shopping with Sena, not only because he's a charming companion, but also because he's very _convenient_.

Suzuna never has to worry about forgetting to buy something until the moment before checking out. Other people usually give up their place in line to return and get their things. But all Suzuna has to do is to tell Sena to get it at the speed of light... He can always come back before their turn.

And when the time is running out, there's always the Devil 4th Dimension to set the clock back.


	10. Chapter 10: The Plot

10. The Plot

"So, this is the plan!" Hiruma declared in delight as he finished typing. "I know exactly how to make fucking glasses confess everything!"

"I get it..." Mamori reacted calmly as she put the last plate into the cupboard, "You're going to get him and Wakana drunk and put them in a locked room on a double bed... Just like what those TV series had done 20 years ago."

Hiruma frowned, "That thought actually walked by for a second but that fucking glasses ain't gonna sip even a drop... And what I want is to make him confess without knowing that he had confessed. Uncovering their secret relationship is fucking simple. A most untalented PI could have done that with ease. That's why I don'[t give a fucking crap about hiding in the bushes in front of his house taking photos everyday. What I want is to tell him that even a fucking cautious man like him could not keep his secret from me."

Mamori listened carefully and sighed as he finished, "I thought Rosemary's case had already satisfied your ego..."

"It did, but making that fucking glasses look like a fool is even more amusing..."

"You're evil."

"Fucking glad you know it." Hiruma got up and took out a bag of blank cards from nowhere. "Don't go," He said to Mamori, "sit here and I'll tell you how it fucking works."

"Not interested, Youichi." Mamori continued walking to the study.

"I need your fucking help."

That surprised Mamori, "That's rare... I thought you had always done it yourself."

"I did but not this time."

"But don't you know I'm against this whole thing? Trying to make Takami and Wakana look embarrassed in ridiculously evil ways is beyond my limits. I know I can't stop you. Remaining an outsider is the only thing I can do."

"You'll have no idea what I'm fucking up to this time... Oh, well... Fine, " Hiruma sat back on his chair, "if you're not helping, there's no point in telling you anything about my plan."

"No, there isn't so stop teasing, Youichi."

"But..." Hiruma continued, "You'll fucking regret this... When you have no idea about what I'm doing, I'll do whatever I want to do. Well, _even if_ you know, you still can't change the fact that I'll do whatever I want to do. But at least, fucking manager can prepare for the worst while the commander from hell plans to blow off their house..."

Mamori stopped and turned around, "You're not really blowing off our house, are you?"

Hiruma shrugged, "You fucking never know..."

"Fine, I give in... Tell me what you're planning." Mamori kind of wanted to admit that she was driven by curiosity but it didn't matter at all. She should know what Hiruma was planning.

"So, are you fucking help me or not?" Hiruma asked first.

Mamori stared at him, "You'll tell me only after I agreed to help you?"

"Do you think I'm fucking stupid enough to reveal a plot for nothing?"

Mamori took a deep breath, "Okay... I'll help you."

Hiruma smirked and opened a file in his laptop, "The whole thing begins with a house party. We'll invite many people, including those two lovebirds. And in the party..."

--------------------------------------

"So, that would be the end of the night with fucking glasses' confession." When Hiruma finally turned off his laptop, Mamori was already lost in thoughts.

"That's very clever, Youichi... I don't think anyone is going to figure out beforehand!"

"Good, so why don;t you start writing those fucking invitation cards now?"

"But you should at least have a purpose for a house party... Otherwise who dares to step into Hiruma Youichi's house? And it's too early for a baby shower... My birthday is too far away also. I know you'll never celebrate your own birthday since..."

"Cerberus."

"What?"

"Just say it's Cerberus's birthday."

"This is absurd..." But Mamori settled herself to writing the cards anyway, "So what about 'It's your favorite dog's birthday! Warmest welcomes...'"

"Just write 'Show up or get killed'..."

Mamori did so.

---------------------------------------

That very night, in bed.

"So, " Hiruma suddenly asked, "does the kid have heartbeats now?"

"Of course he does!"

"How do you know it's a he?"

"Because I prefer _not_ to use 'it'... It just feels awkward." She paused for a moment, "You never told me whether you want a boy or a girl."

"Does it matter what I want? The gender is fucking decided 4 months ago."

"But you must have a preference."

"No, I simply don't fucking care. It's not like I'm going to hate the kid if it came second on my list."

Mamori didn't talk anymore.

Omake 4: How Everyone Reacted to the Invitation

Koutarou & Julie:

K: "So their kid is called Cerberus?"

J: "It's their dog, you moron! What kind of parents would name their child Cerberus? And the baby's expected to come at least 5 months later."

Somehow Julie just suspected that Koutarou was a few months premature... "Such kids just can't be very smart, can they?"

"SMART KICK!!!" Koutarou shouted as the football match shown on TV became white-hot.

"No, they can't..." Julie was too proud to announce that she had just confirmed a medical theory.

Marco & Maria:

"Cerberus? You mean the dog that drank up a whole box of cola in 2 minutes before our semi-final match against Deimon?" Maria asked as she read the card.

"Exactly! How can I ever forget such a magnificent creature!"

"'Magnificent' isn't used to describe dogs... But I can tell that you're just exaggerating."

"That dog's throat is an abyss..." But Marco was already lost in his memory about a certain "magnificent" dog that appreciated his cola so much.

Sena & Suzuna:

Sena turned pale when he opened the envelope containing the card.

"Cerberus's birthday?" Suzuna was nothing but cheerful. "That would be fun!"

"But Hiruma-san never mentioned that the dog actually had a birthday! Not in all these years!"

"Does it matter at all, Sena? You're still going, aren't you?"

"I don't want to get killed..."

"Good! Let's buy Cerberus a present tomorrow!"

"I think he would prefer 'Man on the Stove' best. And by 'man' I mean me... So, either way I'm going to suffer." Sena sighed.

Musashi:

"This is got to be a **conspiracy**..."

Takami:

"This is weird... Is Hiruma up to something?"

Wakana:

"Wow! A party!" She also found an extra note attached to the card, which read:

"_I'm intending to make a strawberry cake for Cerberus that day. Could you come early that day to help me? -Mamori_"

Of course she would go...

And so the plot began...


	11. Chapter 11: The Party

11. The Party

Cerberus's so-called birthday, 2 pm.

The doorbell rang.

"Disappear now, Youichi, I don't want her to see you here!" Mamori signaled as she hurried to the door.

Hiruma smirked and slid into his monitor room.

Cerberus still wandered around the house.

"Wakana-chan! How nice of you to come and help me! There's no way I'm going to finish 2 cakes in one afternoon!"

"No problem, Mamori. I also brought you different kinds of essence, cassia twigs and most importantly, fresh strawberries! You know what," She went on as she entered the kitchen, "I think my homemade cream would be just the right thing for the cakes!"

"Really? That would be good..."

And then came the ordinary chitchat between ladies, which totally bored Hiruma as he stared at the many screens of his monitor trying to find the tinniest clue.

"Why did God give women fucking tongues..." He sighed.

Cerberus, since who knows when, has been crouching behind him, also had his eyes on the screen.

"So, Wakana-chan, who was lucky enough to be the first to taste your cakes?" Mamori asked in a very casual tone as she wiped her cooker.

But Wakana was so occupied with the cream that it took her a while to respond, "Pardon?"

"There! Got a fucking pause!" Hiruma immediately replayed the scene, "See? There was a 1.87-second pause... No way she's this blunt. She fucking did that on purpose, giving herself time to come up with a fucking fake answer." He pointed to the screen, explaining to Cerberus as if the dog was a complicity.

"I just asked, " Mamori continued, "who was the first one to try your never-before-made strawberry cake?"

"Oh, just a few old friends from school..." Wakana answered, still stirring the mixture in the bowl, "|A few girls... I had thought about inviting someone from the White Knights, but I was afraid that Shin might give very professional remarks which would end up proving my cake a failure... But I did okay that time. It was a nice gathering."

"Liar!" Hiruma said. "She's giving more answers than asked for... No eye contact with the questioner, pretended to be busy but in fact just screwing with the cream, plus the over-explaining... All basic signs of lying. Fucking glasses obviously forgot to teach her a few lessons on how to hide their secret relationship...." He rewound the record a few more times and confirmed his theory. "First-hand evidence obtained!" He sipped his coffee after a light chuckle.

--------------------------------------

Cerberus's so-called birthday, 4:30 pm.

"They seem great already!" Mamori looked at the half-done cakes with satisfaction. "Now it's time for the cream!" Then Wakana handed her the cream.

"So, have you guys named the baby yet?"

"Nope, we don't even know if it's a boy or a girl."

"But wouldn't it be better if you knew it beforehand? 'Cause then you'll know what kind of toys to buy and what color the wallpaper of the room should be!"

"You're right... I should persuade him into doing something about that... You know Youichi, he doesn't give a crap about this at all." Mamori kind of intentionally let her feelings out because she knew Hiruma would be monitoring their conversation the whole time. "It's hard to imagine how he's going to get along with the baby..." She deliberately looked right into one of the secret cameras in the kitchen for she knew he would see it.

Hiruma did see her do that. "I think she just found a whole new function of modern technology... We sleep together side by side every night and now she's fucking telling me how she feels through a fucking camera... This is what you call 'the gulf between men'?"

"Hummph..." Cerberus answered.

--------------------------------------------

Cerberus's so-called birthday, 6:30 pm.

The doorbell rang.

Mamori, who was wearing a loose pink dress with ribbons attached to the waist, opened the door, "Sena! Suzuna! Oh, lovely gift!" She smiled as she saw the huge bone-shaped marshmallow in Sena's arms. "Cerberus will love it!"

"Well, " Sena looked nervous, "I was hoping that he would hate it... But I just realized that Cerberus never said no to anything eatable... Oh, I should have bought something else, something made of plastic or glass or steel..."

"Don't be a chicken, Sena..." Suzuna comforted, "That's why we bought something of such a size. It's basic delaying tactic. When he finally finishes this baby, you'll be lost in the crowd. He'll soon find somewhere to haunt."

"Yeah, he won't get you, Sena... Don't worry." Mamori said.

"Okay!" Sena nodded with a bit more confidence.

Mamori then turned around and called, "Cerberus! Come and get your birthday present from Sena!"

"Mamo-neechan, you shouldn't have done that..." Sena tried to stop her but it was too late as Cerberus roared from the depth of the house and threw himself onto the huge bone at the speed of light.

So this is the right order when looked from above: the sky, Cerberus, huge bone-shaped marshmallow, Sena, the ground.

"You just can't resist yourself, can you, doggie?" Suzuna affectionately watched Cerberus before she entered the house to have a drink with Mamori. And yes, she kind of forgot the fact that Sena was not in the right place.

"Suzuna... How could you..."

-------------------------------------

Cerberus's so-called birthday, 6:50 pm.

Takami arrived.

Mamori signaled to Hiruma through the camera, "Be on the alert if you are to take actions. The target person is present, Youichi."

Hiruma grinned, "From now on I'm in charge of this fucking party."

"Good evening, Takami-kun. It's good to see you here." Mamori greeted as she led Takami in. "The main course is not yet ready but there are plenty of drinks and refreshments. Just help yourself, Takami-kun. " Mamori explained and went into the kitchen, leaving Takami to explore the party himself.

When Takami entered the house, he immediately spotted Wakana among the guests. But it would look very suspicious if he greeted her first. So he decided to talk to other guests first before he eventually say hi to Wakana in very ordinary manners.

"Takami-kun!" Wakana looked surprised when she saw him, "I never knew you'd be here!"

"Oh, well, things happen..." He laughed casually.

At that very moment, Hiruma appeared as if he was never there before. (Well, he was not there before...)

"Why, fucking glasses, hehehe... I thought you never gave a damn." He walked toward Takami.

Takami looked at him skeptically, "You don't look like someone who gives a damn about parties as well, Hiruma. But... 'Hell's Party'?" He pointed to the banner hung on the wall, "It suits you, and your dog."

Their conversation continued in an unimaginably terrifying atmosphere the same as the one that terrorized Sena and Yuki years ago in a certain restaurant.

---------------------------------------------

Cerberus's so-called birthday, 7:00 pm.

"Attention please, everyone!" Mamori announced to the guest that there will be a game. "Here we have two newly made strawberry cakes which look exactly the same... But they are made separately by either me or our lovely Wakana-chan who came to help me with the food served tonight. Taste these 2 cakes and write down your answer and your name on a card..." As she continued on the instructions, Musashi, who was sitting on the sofa with Hiruma, asked, "Why a party, Hiruma? This is so not like you."

"Yeah, like I've ever done anything fucking predictable."

"But I like the huge cardboard Cerberus at the front of the yard..."

"Go eat the cake, fucking old man..."

Musashi let out a laugh and rose.

Hiruma watched the guests as they tried the 2 cakes in turns. Most of them looked confused, and were unable to make a decision. Well, there are always exceptions.

"A-ha-ha! 200% sure!" Taki lifted his leg, thumbs-up.

"You know the answer already?" Sena asked. He had just recovered from Cerberus's torture.

"Of course! The one who made the cakes are 200% MY SISTER!"

Suzuna almost dropped her plate. "Moron..."

Hiruma observed everyone's reactions, well, he _looked like_ that he was observing everyone's reaction... But you know who he was watching the whole time.

Takami, just like any other guest, got his share of cake, rubbed some cream off the tip of the cake with his fork, and put it into his mouth. After he tasted the cream from the first one, a confident smile appeared on his face.

This was just what Hiruma wanted.

Then he tasted the second cake... The sparkles in his eyes disappeared... He was frozen for an instant as if a lightning bolt struck his spine.

"Fucking glasses just betrayed himself..." Hiruma smiled as he rose, "Show time!"

The lights went off at once...


	12. Chapter 12: The Firework

12. The Firework

"Wow!" Astonished, Suzuna stared into the darkness with wonder. "What a party!"

"Now you're being naive..." Sena said, "Hiruma-san must have planned something utterly terrible!"

"Wow as well!"

"Well, " Hiruma spoke to the darkness, "as you all know, this is NOT Cerberus's fucking birthday party."

Musashi stumbled to Mamori and asked, "What's this about?"

Mamori shook her head, "Whatever you think it is, he's just telling the truth and yes, I knew this all along. Sorry."

Musashi nodded with a "wow".

"First, " Hiruma started with a cackle, which totally freaked everyone out, "tell me the result of the game."

The room fell into silence.

Mamori sweat-dropped and said, "You'll have to turn on the lights before you go over the cards... Since, as you can see, it's completely dark here, Youichi."

Her words proved the turn-off-all-the-lights action very unnecessary.

After the lights were turned on again, Hiruma dived his hand into the box and took out the cards one by one. "While I'm doing this, tell me how you can fucking tell these two cakes apart."

"No idea, they taste very much alike." Musashi answered, trying to lighten the tension. "And very good, too."

"So that's how you all fucking felt just now?" Hiruma asked again. He didn't seem to have found anything valuable from the box.

Takami pushed his glasses and sighed, "Yes, the cakes tasted exactly the same and don't try to raise another subject when everyone is trying to figure out your real purpose for this mysterious party, Hiruma."

"Do you know my real purpose for this fucking party, fucking glasses?"

"Of course not!"

Hiruma grinned, "Then why an electric whisk?"

"What?" Takami looked puzzled. But at the same time, Wakana's face changed.

"Youichi... " Covering her face with embarrassment, Mamori cut in, "I led you screw with this party so can you ust get to your point?"

"Fine." A little annoyed, Hiruma continued, "What I need to say is that this fucking glasses is currently dating the former manager of the Ojo White Knights!"

"Wow!" By everyone.

Takami's jaw almost dropped when he heard Hiruma's announcement, "So _this_ is your purpose of the party?"

Wakana's couldn't speak since her face grew all red and stuff.

"How'd you know?" Takami asked.

"Now you're fucking confessing it, aren't you?"

"Well, if it's you, I have no point in hiding it... And, as a matter of fact, I'm more shocked by your interest in my personal life than the purpose of the party itself." Takami leaned closer and asked again, "How did you know? I thought I did a perfect job in hiding it."

"Two things, what you bought some weeks ago and what you said just now."

"What did I say just now?"

"That fucking old man said, ' very much alike ' while you said ' exactly the same '. It's weird, isn't it?"

Takami thought for a moment and broke into laughter, "You set me up, didn't you, Hiruma?"

"Yes, he did." Mamori answered, "Wakana and me made the cakes separately in the beginning but Wakana did the cream for both of them... That's why they tasted exactly the same..."

"But for those who never ate the cakes, the idea of ' cakes made by 2 people ' arrived first of everything. So however similar they tasted, you people would unconsciously decide that they are just slightly different instead of ' exactly the same '." Hiruma explained.

Takami smiled, "But I know the exact taste of her cream so when I tasted both of them, I was shocked... You captured my facial expression, didn't you, Hiruma?"

"Yes, he did..." Mamori said, at the same time tapping on Wakana's shoulder.

Takami looked at Wakana for a second, "I knew this would come sooner or later... But I never expected Hiruma to reveal this..."

"And I didn't know you would be so convincing about this..." Wakana laughed nervously but also happily.

"Wow!" Suzuna again, all excited and hopping everywhere.

"Suzuna, " Sena held her arm, "your antenna is spinning like crazy..."

------------------------------------

It was surprising enough that the party actually went on safely.

"That's it, Youichi?" Mamori asked Hiruma in the hallway when the newly-discovered couple was already chatting with other guests on relationship issues. "You don't plan to do anything else?"

"You _want_ me to do something else?"

"No! It's just... It's hard to believe that you're satisfied already, since the party is only half-way through."

Hiruma smirked, "Now comes to the question that if you really know everything about my fucking plan for tonight..."

"So you admit you're hiding something from me?"

"It wouldn't be fun if you know everything."

"So it's really the blowing-off-our-house thing?"

"Almost..."

"What?!" Mamori gasped but Hiruma left without answering.

Stepping into the living room, and euipped his whole set of firearms, Hiruma announced, "Attention, you people, the game is not over yet!"

All the guests turned their faces to Hiruma, nervously waiting.

Hiruma took out a remote from nowhere and pressed a button, "Boom..." He bluffed.

_Boom!_

The roof of the house split apart.

"Time for some fucking explosion!" Hiruma pressed the button again and a series of firing and shooting and launching started around the house, shaking the neighborhood as if a massive earthquake occurred. And in the evening skies, firework went off in a cascade of colors.

"Happy fucking birthday, Cerberus..." Hiruma said to the dog.

"Warrff!"

It was Cerberus's birthday after all...

------------------------------------------

"Wow! Firework! So romantic!" Sat on the soft grass, Suzuna leaned on Sena's shoulder, "Will you put on firework for me, Sena?"

"If you let me disappear with the Devil Bat Ghost... Yes, maybe." He answered, "I think that one looks like a football, doesn't it?"

Also enjoying the waterfall of splendor by the window, Mamori said to Hiruma, "Wakana was right, we should know the gender beforehand so we'll know what kind of toys to buy and what color the wallpaper should be."

"You're fucking telling me this all out of a sudden because..."

"Because I think a prenatal examination is necessary? Fine, I'm curious. Are you with me or not?"

"Uhmm..."

"So it's a yes?" Mamori tentatively asked again.

"If you have made an appointment with the fucking doctor... I'm okay with it." Hiruma shrugged.

"I'll call later..." Mamori sat next to him and kissed him on the cheek, "The firework is so beautiful, Youichi... Too bad somebody can't see it now, not yet."

"You can get it videotaped if you want..."

"Have a sense of romance, Youichi! You are always spoiling the moment..."

But deep in her heart, she enjoyed his spoiling more than anything else...

----------------------------------------------

When the party was over, Musashi came up to Mamori and said, "Nice party!"

"Thanks, I hope we didn't screw up."

"No, the food was great, the firework was wonderful... Will you be having a baby shower later?"

"Maybe, we'll see. But I'm not sure what Youichi wants. After tonight, we all know what to expect from him... He never told me about the fireworks."

Musashi paused and nodded as if he knew something she didn't, "Hiruma likes fireworks... It reminds him of the taste of victory. I'm sure you also liked the fireworks."

"I hope the neighbors won't complain..."

"No, I don't think so, who dares to complain about Hiruma Youichi?"

"Yeah, you';re right..." Mamori smiled.


	13. Chapter 13: The Angel from Hell

13. The Angel from Hell

"It's a girl."

That was the recap of what the doctor had told them. On their way home, Mamori asked, "Pink, lavender, magenta, yellow, vermillion, saffron and purple... Oh, so many colors to choose from. C'mon, Youichi, pick one for the wallpaper!"

"Black."

"No way!"

"Definitely black, no dispute!"

"You can't let a baby girl grow up in a room with black walls! It would be like in prison!"

"It can also help her sleep. Black for sure."

"No!"

"Or you have a certain answer?" Hiruma asked, "You obviously don't know what color is appropriate but I know with certainty that her room should be black. Either you randomly pick one of those nasty girly colors, or just do black."

"What's the problem with a baby girl's room being girly?!"

"She's Hiruma Youichi's kid, that's the fucking problem!"

So they did black.

"See? It matches the theme of the house." was Hiruma's remark.

"You did succeed in making a baby girl's room hell-like..." Mamori sighed, "But I guess, she'll like it."

--------------------------------------------------

Outside the delivery room, Hiruma sat and waited.

Usually, when fathers are nervously waiting for the good news, they jump out of their seats whenever they hear a baby's scream thinking whose kid it might be. But Hiruma just sat there very quietly, as if he wasn't waiting for anything.

Then Nurse Oka came by, "Why are you so calm, Hiruma? How do you know the screaming does not come from your baby?"

"I just don't think her fucking screams are as lousy and unbearable as the others. I can tell... And why do you show up in absolutely every department of the fucking hospital?"

Just as they talked, a young nurse came out looking worried. She had a baby in her arms.

"Now is that the Hiruma girl?" Oka asked.

"Yes... But, but it's strange..." The nurse continued, "Don't babies cry real hard when they are born, trying to breathe in fresh air for the first time in their lives? But this baby girl is so... So quiet."

"Satisfied, Hiruma?" Oka turned her pale pale face to him, "She's not even screaming at all."

"Is she fucking breathing?" Hiruma asked.

"I guess... But it should have started with a cry. This is so abnormal." The nurse replied.

Hiruma nodded, "You shouldn't be expecting ordinary things to happen. Her family name is Hiruma."

"Oh, look, "The nurse said tenderly, "her little fists are moving... She might want to hold something..."

Hiruma rolled his eyes, "I have just the right thing for her."

--------------------------------------------

"Youichi, " Mamori asked when the nurse put the beautiful little baby next to her pillow, "tell me why is she holding a bullet?"

"She likes it."

"But obviously, she didn't _ask_ for it! You gave it to her!"

"Again, she likes it."

"Her nose should be filled the scent of flowers or milk, not metal and gun powder."

Just then, Musashi, along with Kurita, Sena and others members from the Devil Bats entered the room.

"Wow, did I just see a bullet?" Musashi said.

Mamori frowned, "Take it away, Youichi."

"Fine..." Though very unwilling to do so, Hiruma reached his long index finger into the baby's small palms and hooked up the bullet.

Just then, the baby opened her eyes, emerald eyes just like Hiruma's. Her empty hands scratched each other as if looking for the lost toy. When she finally confirmed that her bullet was gone, she burst out screaming and crying so loud like hell that the whole floor was at the risk of collapsing.

Nurse Oka rushed in, "Is there something wrong?"

"No, " Hiruma answered, "this is the screaming and crying you wanted to hear. Sounds pretty nice, huh? So loud that would shatter the ceiling, apparently better than those weak, flabby cries that would end in 2 seconds."

"Remarkable..." Kurita said, covering his ears.

Mamori didn't know what to do, "What does she want?"

"The fucking bullet, I guess."

"But I'm not going to let you give that thing back to her again. She can't hold a bullet forever!"

But how was she ever going to stop? The baby seemed to have inexhaustible energy.

Hiruma looked at his daughter for a moment, and suddenly he made a dry firing and shouted, "Stop!"

The baby girl went silent all of a sudden.

"Impressive!" Suzuna said.

Hiruma looked at her again, she was looking at him also. They were like giving secret signals by eye contact when Hiruma suddenly said, "Cry!"

And she started to cry like hell again.

"Stop!" She stopped.

Everyone watched the father and the still-an-infant daughter's well cooperated act.

Mamori, on the other hand, was the most shocking, "She obeys your orders, apparently all of them. Did you insert a chip into her brain so you can control her with a remote?"

"Fucking no, I guess she just enjoyed the teamwork..." Hiruma answered.

The room became quiet again so Sena asked, "So, what's her name?"

"Meiyuu, talking about the depths of hell." Hiruma replied.

"That's a beautiful name." Suzuna said, "She's so lovely, like an angel."

"An angel from hell, to be exaxt." Mamori sighed.

-----------------------------------------------------------

A few days later, they returned home.

As Meiyuu lied in her cradle, quietly sleeping, Mamori and Hiruma sat on both sides of the swinging basket.

"I wonder, Youichi, " Mamori started, "what will Meiyuu be like when she grows up. I once imagined her grow up to be an adorable girl who loves creampuffs, needlework and books. Then you, Youichi, you showed up in my thoughts and I was certain that she would never turn to a girl just like me."

"Fucking right about that..."

"You won't let her grow up to be an ordinary girl. You'll teach her how to fire, how to reveal a passer-by's privacy, how to make people afraid of you... Maybe you'll teach her about football, I don't know. Am I right about this, Youichi?"

"She can do both, I mean, half you and half me. By then the only fucking thing she can't do will be to signal herself with sign language."

Mamori smiled and touched Meiyuu's face with affection, "She has your eyes, Youichi."

"The fucking black wallpaper does help her sleep, doesn't it?"

"Ah, you're sidetracking again. Can't you just admit your daughter is so lovely that you need to be quiet and just enjoy being with her?"

"I don't think she needs two people to watch her fall asleep... She's already fucking asleep anyway. Cerberus can do the watching."

"Why are you anxious about leaving this room?"

At that moment, Hiruma gave her a wink.

Mamori blushed, "You pervert..."

--------------------------------------------------------------

Although she obeyed her father's commands, Meiyuu was a born trouble maker.

While her young parents were at the peak of their fun, Meiyuu opened her eyes, cleared her throat and burst into a loud cry.

"I'll go get her..." Mamori got up but suddenly, she turned to Hiruma, "She listens to you. You go."

Unwilling to waste a single second, Hiruma headed for Meiyuu's room.

But the moment he opened the door, the crying stopped.

What Mamori saw was an angry, pissed-off Hiruma.

"What happened? I didn't hear you yelling at her."

"That little devil fucking did that to sabotage us..."


	14. Chapter 14: The Scent

14. The Scent

When Meiyuu was 100 days old, her mother gave her a huge Cerberus doll.

"What's the fucking point of having a fake dog when she's already got a real one?" Hiruma questioned.

"Because _somebody_ wouldn't let me buy any toy for her... " Mamori frowned, "I understand that you want to equip her with your weapons but can't you just wait till she gets older? Let her have some fluffy friends before you turn her into a true Hiruma."

"Fucking too late, she's got fangs already..."

"I don't want to argue, Youichi, why don't you show her what you've got?"

Hiruma smirked and took out a deck of poker from nowhere, "It's time for some fucking formative education." He handed the cards to Meiyuu, "Befriend these fucking lovely figures so one day we can turn Las Vegas into gutter."

"Very well..." Mamori sighed, "Now I'm wondering what you're giving her on her one-year-old birthday."

-------------------------------------

One evening when Hiruma was going over the paper and Mamori busy in the kitchen, something happened.

Meiyuu was charging at the Cerberus doll (with Cerberus watching beside her)before she suddenly stopped and formed an indistinct sound, "Da... Dada!"

The whole house dropped into the abyss of silence.

"Wha... What was that?" Mamori asked.

Hiruma put away the paper and stared at Meiyuu, "Say it again, fucking kid."

"Dada..." Meiyuu repeated.

"Wow, I think she's talking to you, Youichi."

Hiruma formed a sceptical face. "Anything else you want to say, kid?" He asked again.

The next thing Meiyuu did was crawling to his feet and grabbed his rifle which was placed next to his leg.

"Gum!" She shouted happily.

Mamori walked towards Hiruma and explained, "I think she mixed up 'm' and 'n'... She probably meant 'gun' but just couldn't form the sound. It's normal, some books say so."

But Hiruma didn't think that way. He took out his sugarless gum and asked, "What's this, kid?"

With a finger in her mouth, Meiyuu said confidently, "Gun!"

Hiruma and Mamori looked at each other, feeling that they were sabotaged again.

"This feeling fucking sucks..." Hiruma went back to his paper.

Mamori shrugged, "At least, we know she's not mixing up..."

-------------------------------------------

Meiyuu was a genius. She started to play cards with her father at 18 months, learned to use a video camera before 2 and before you knew it, she was the ruler of the local daycare center.

Mamori had doubts about letting Meiyuu go to the daycare center. She was afraid that Meiyuu might make mischief. But to her surprise, Meiyuu's teacher, Jasmine, spoke very highly of the girl.

"She's done a big help!" Jasmine told Mamori one day, gratefully.

"That was unexpected..." Mamori said, "Did she help you take care of the other kids?" Somehow, Mamori felt that if her assumption was proven right, Meiyuu might have actually inherited it from her. "Finally she sounds like my girl" was what Mamori was thinking at that moment.

But Jasmine just smiled, shaking her head, "No, she's too little to take care of the others. But there's something really special about her, Mrs. Hiruma. I think she's one in a million."

"So exactly what did she do to make you think that way?"

"She took over all the bad guys in the games." Jasmine answered.

"What?"

"You know those games where they pretend to be a family or people from fairy tales or whatever, " Jasmine continued, "some will be the good guys and some bad guys. Usually, it's a headache to see little children fighting over who's playing the bad guys. Nodoby wanted to be the bad guys. But Meiyuu never thought that way. She was always the very first person to volunteer to be the villain. No matter it's a witch or dragon or ghost... Ever since she's been here, I've never seen the children quarreling over who's playing the bad guys. Never again!"

Mamori's mouth was wide-open when Jasmine finished, and it took her a few seconds to respond, "So she's _always_ playing the villain?"

"Yep, and as far as I know, the villain _always_ wins." Jasmine nodded.

---------------------------------------

Hiruma was utterly amused when Mamori told him what Meiyuu had been doing in daycare.

"This is just fucking nice." He laughed, "I think she's ready for other things as well. It's earlier than I expected but I think it's time."

"What do you mean, Youichi?" Mamori asked.

"You'll see..." Then he whispered to her ears.

Mamori covered her mouth and objected, "No way, not this early, Youichi, she's not even..."

Hiruma put a finger on her mouth, "Just do as I say." Then he left the room.

That very evening, before dinner was served, Mamori called, "Meiyuu, tell your father dinner's ready."

"Daddy is in his base." Meiyuu answered, "He never lets me in."

"It's okay, just go get him. He won't kill you..."

"What if he does?"

"No, sweetheart, your father was just bluffing. He always bluffs, you know."

"About everything?"

"Just go, Meiyuu, or the food would go cold."

Meiyuu finally obeyed and walked down the basement.

"Daddy?" It was dark inside, with the smell of gunpowder. "Dinner's ready!" She walked slowly and carefully as the dim candle light gradually lightened her sight. She had never been in the base before. But passing by the entrance every day left her nothing but curiosity. What was it like in this base? What would daddy do here? Why couldn't I go in? These questions remained in her heart until this day, when the answers were revealed.

"Daddy? Where are you?" She searched around when suddenly, a long shadow blocked the light behind her.

"Why are you here, fucking kid?"

Meiyuu quickly turned around and saw her father, with a rifle in his hands, staring at her from above.

"Din... Dinner's ready. Mommy told me to get you here." Despite her slight fear, Meiyuu asked curiously, "What do you do down here, daddy?"

Hiruma showed his fangs as he tempted, "You wanna know?"

Meiyuu stared at her father, "So you are not driving me out of here?"

"Of course not... Hehehe..." Hiruma sneered, "It's time for you, the future owner to get to know your fucking place of breathtaking treasures." Then he handed Meiyuu a remote, "Press the fucking button."

Meiyuu always did what her father told her to so she pressed the silver button and...

_Boom!_

All of a sudden the bright light in the base swept the darkness away, reflecting in every corner of the devil's dungeon. But what surprised Meiyuu more was not the sudden brightness... As the light went on, Hiruma's collection of firearms was also revealed. Orderly, the guns were lined up in rows like soldiers waiting for a command.

"SWEET!" Meiyuu gasped, "This is so cool, daddy!"

"You fucking like it?"

"Yeah!" Meiyuu bounced around the place like a fawn chasing a butterfly, "I love it! Daddy, why didn't you show me all these guns before? They are just so dreadfully cool!"

Hiruma smiled as he answered, "Well, I had to wait until you're fucking taller than at least one of these babies... Now that you are fucking tall enough, so..."

"Will you teach me to fire, daddy?"

"Sure."

Screaming in joy, Meiyuu jumped onto Hiruma, "Yippee! I love you, daddy!"

"Fucking whatever..." Hiruma kind of wanted to say "me too" but it was so not the atmosphere to show father love since they were surrounded by cold, shiny weapons.

That evening, at the dinner table, Meiyuu was more talkative than ever.

"Which gun should I start with? When can I shoot? And where will we shoot, in our backyard, or in the woods?" She definitely had the genes of a weapon maniac. Mamori kind of expected this to happen, "She's just like you, Youichi." She remarked, "It's good to have someone that also loves weapons..." That reminded her of someone she met a few years ago. "She's still in jail, isn't she?" Mamori suddenly asked.

"Who?" Meiyuu asked.

"Long story... Nevermind." Trying to raise another subject, Mamori asked Meiyuu, "I heard that there's a new teacher in the daycare."

"Yep, she's taking us to the zoo next week. She's very pretty, mommy..."

And the conversation was finally like those warm, domestic ones you have at the dinner table.

-------------------------------------

Meiyuu was a quick learner. Within a week, she could name every single gun in her father's base. One evening, when Mamori was refilling her little flavoring bottles, she heard a loud gunshot from the base. She immediately put aside her things and rushed to the base.

"What was that?" She asked.

"Sorry, mommy, " With her goggles on, Meiyuu answered, "it went off by accident... But no one's hurt. Right, daddy?"

"No, you fucking hurt the wall..." Hiruma said.

Relieved, Mamori decided to go back to the kitchen, "Be careful with her, Youichi, you almost gave me a heart attack..."

"It won't happen again, mommy."

It would, she just knew it.

"Now, where was I?" She almost forgot which bottle she was refilling, "Black pepper, it should be..."

------------------------------------

The next morning, Meiyuu stood by the kitchen counter, waiting for her sandwich.

"I've always wanted to go to the zoo, mommy." She said excitedly, "And the day finally came!" As she waited, she randomly took the unnamed bottles on the counter. "Do they smell nice?" She asked.

"Some are sweet and some are spicy... Put them back where they belong, sweetie."

"My new teacher, " Meiyuu said, with the red bottle in her hand, "she smells like this."

"You mean pepper?" Mamori glanced at the bottle, "That's where I keep black pepper."

"I don't think it's black pepper but I couldn't tell exactly what it is... Maybe it's something similiar."

Just then, they heard Hiruma's impatient taps on the bar counter, "Time to go, fucking kid."

With her breakfast in her hand, Meiyuu followed her father as they got in the car and left for the daycare center where a bus will take Meiyuu and her friends to the zoo.

"A daycare teacher smelling like black pepper, how strange..." Mamori thought. Then she took a yellow bottle from the table which was supposed to have curry inside. "Curry for lunch with Youichi?" She asked herself as she sniffed the bottle, but it didn't smell like curry. "This isn't curry... It's black pepper..." That was when Mamori suddenly realized that she had misplaced the flavoring last night due to the sudden gunshot.

"That's why Meiyuu said it wasn't black pepper!" Frowning at her mistake, Mamori sighed, "Now I want to know exactly how she smelled..."

It was like a joke at first when Mamori reached for the red bottle, looking forward to finding out the special scent from Meiyuu's new teacher. But the joke soon turned into fleer, horrible, heartbreaking fleer.

"It's definitely not black pepper... It's..." She was abruptly strangled by a certain word that was coming out of her mouth. "Meiyuu said she smelt just like the thing in the red bottle, didn't she?" She asked herself. "And the thing in the red bottle... It's... It's rosemary... Her new teacher smelt like rosemary? No way..."

Just then, the phone rang.

Worried, Mamori picked up the phone, "Hello?"

"Hey..." A creepy voice greeted on the other side, "Do you remember me?"


	15. Chapter 15: The Rescue I

15. The Rescue I

Hiruma's cell phone rang.

It' was Mamori, so he answered the call with a mechanical voice, "The person you are calling is currently fucking driving, leave your message after the 'Ya-Ha" sound..."

"I know you're faking, Youichi! Rosemary kidnapped Meiyuu!"

But he didn't seem to be very concerned, "And you fucking know that because..."

"She just called me! She said she wants you to be there, I mean the zoo."

"You sure she kidnapped her? Because the hostage is fucking hopping all around the place."

"How, how do you know..."

"Once upon a time, a fucking genius invented something called GPS... I inserted trackers in her trainers. So she's either not-yet-kidnapped or really kidnapped but her trainers managed to run away..." Hiruma paused, "Anyway, I'm heading for the zoo now."

"No!" Mamori shouted at the phone.

"What? She fucking told you not to let me go to the zoo?"

"No, that's not what I meant. Come home and pick me up. I'm going with you."

"No way, I'm not letting that fucking criminal hold one more hostage..."

Mamori was silent for a second before she continued in a serious tone, "Youichi, I'm your wife and I'm Meiyuu's mother. Last time you lied to protect me but this is different! _We_ are going to save Meiyuu, as a family. I don't want to make Meiyuu think that her mother is one of those ordinary, weak, weeping-for-a-message-of-safety-by-the-phone housewives! If she's ever rescued, she should be rescued by both of us."

It was not the time to exclaim over mother love so Hiruma said, "Okay, I'll be at the door in 10 minutes. And you'd better get Cerberus equipped as well."

"Why?"

"You were the one that fucking said we would be going as a family. He wouldn't be happy if you left him behind."

"Fine..."

--------------------------------------------

At the zoo, it was almost lunch break so the kids gathered outside a store.

But Meiyuu didn't seem to be hungry.

Rosemary came up and said, "Why don't you take a seat, Meiyuu?"

"No, I'm not hungry. Can I go and see one more animal, Miss R?" "Miss R" is what Rosemary told the kids to call her so certain parents wouldn't suspect.

Rosemary smiled and asked, "What is it that you want to see so bad?"

"This!" Meiyuu quickly pointed to a picture printed on the map, "I don't know the exact name but it's my favorite animal. Is it a giant rat or something?"

"No, I don't think so... But why don't I take you there alone? I kind of want to see it too."

"Really? Then we should get going!"

Rosemary then told another teacher to look after the kids and took Meiyuu away from everyone else.

"You want me to buy you a drink, Meiyuu?" She asked.

Meiyuu nodded, "I want blueberry juice."

--------------------------------------------

On the other hand, Hiruma, Mamori and Cerberus (equipped with an extra strong collar) were all on their way to the zoo.

Meiyuu still seemed to be walking all around the place freely according to the GPS screen.

"How did she even managed to run away from prison?"

"Who knows... What I know is that I have important information to threaten the fucking prison guards.

"Very well... But she probably did this as vengeance. It's good that Meiyuu is not the crying-for-help kind... She would try her best to seek escape."

"About Meiyuu, there's one thing I was not sure with... Well, not about her exactly." Hiruma said, "Why did you fucking even let her touch guns? It's so not like the 'Mamo-neechan is here to protect you' situation I once experienced."

Mamori bit her lips, "Well... It's not like that I'm really okay with you teaching her to fire... I'm still against violence but... But Meiyuu is just so, so _like you_. I couldn't ignore that! She listens to you, adores you and will just be a mini version of Hiruma Youichi... How could I ever say no? I remember you telling me that you didn't mind if our first child would be a boy or a girl because either way it's still your kid. This is the same with me. Even if Meiyuu grew up in a way slightly different from my ideal one, she's still my girl. Enough explanation?"

"Hmmff!" Cerberus seemed to be satisfied...

"Youichi, are you even listening?"

Hiruma was staring at the screen, "She stopped moving."

He was right, the spot on the screen stayed in the same place for at least two minutes.

Mamori's cell phone rang.

"It's her..." Mamori answered it, "How is she right now?"

"Don't be so furious. She is one intact little sleeping beauty, you know?"

"You drugged her?"

"I'm just calling to tell you that I will be waiting at the TDs'."

"What?"

"TDs'..." The voice faded, creepily.

Rosemary hanged up.

"What did she fucking say?"

"TDs'. She said she would be waiting at the TDs'."

"TD... You mean touchdowns?"

"Of course not! It should be somewhere in the zoo... Think animals, Youichi."

10 seconds later, "Trained ducks?"

"That doesn't sound like a very good place to hide a hostage..."

"Turkey dens?"

"Better but don't turkeys nest?"

Before they figured out, the car was outside the zoo.

One of the zoo staff stood at the gate. "Sorry, pets aren't allowed in the zoo."

"What are you fucking talking about? Then who gave you permission to keep all those creatures in this place?" He stared at the guy for a second, "And as far as I know, you are having an affair with one of your colleagues. She trains dolphins, doesn't she? You mind I call your wife now?"

And they went in without a problem.

"So, TDs'... What are they..." Mamori unfold the map and started combing every corner and hole.

"There!" But Hiruma was the first to find out, "That's probably her favorite animal. See here?"

Mamori fixed her eyes on the far north corner of the zoo, "Tasmanian devils..."


	16. Chapter 16: The Rescue II

16. The Rescue II

"This is insane..." Mamori turned away and sighed.

"What? It's not like you have a fucking better idea!"

"But you sure the TDs can tell Cerberus exactly where Rosemary took Meiyuu?"

"Hhmmff!" Cerberus's got something.

Hiruma smirked, "See?"

What the TDs told Cerberus was that a very sexy young woman with a sleeping little girl in her arms went into the deep woods behind their place. A beaten track gave them an idea of where the warehouse might be.

Hiruma glanced around, "In case she set up any traps, watch your fucking feet."

"This is insane. What does she want?"

"Nothing! She just wants to fucking manipulate us... But we ain't fucking puppets."

They stopped before a tiny bungalow about the size of a public toilet.

"A bungalow so small... No way this is a warehouse!" Mamori said.

But Hiruma went direct in.

The inside was nearly empty. Two cups of blueberry juice was found on the floor.

"They've been here, Youichi. It's the blueberry juice she bought for Meiyuu."

"Definitely... There's probably a secret entrance to the fucking underground warehouse."

"How do you know it's underground? Is it possible that there's another..."

Hiruma kneeled down to examine the floor while he answered, "That fucking bitch's only got 2 hands. She had to hold Meiyuu and 2 cups of blueberry juice at the same time. If it's just a normal warehouse above the ground, there's no point in dumping both cups... She could have kept the clean one to herself since she's probably dreadfully thirsty as well. But if she had to climb down a ladder, it all makes sense." Suddenly, he stopped.

"Here it is." Hiruma raised and aimed his artillery at a certain part of the floor and BANG!

A hole appeared with a ladder inside that led them to the underground.

Mamori gasped, "You could have blown up the ladder, Youichi!"

"Well, since I didn't do it. Fucking get down here!"

"You go first."

"You fucking scared?"

"No, but I suddenly had an idea." With Hiruma half-way down the ladder, Mamori disappeared from his sight for a few seconds and went back in.

"What the fuck did you do?"

"You'll see."

-----------------------------------------

Mamori's cell phone rang the moment the 3 of them reached the bottom.

"Where are you?" Mamori asked.

"Catch me if you can... You know I'm always available." Rosemary's snaky smile still sounded so real through the phone. "And by the way, I didn't know your daughter also loved blueberry juice. I used to be crazy about it."

"You'll regret doing all these, Chick."

"Will I? Heh?" Rosemary hanged up.

Mamori heard her laugh, so creepy and evil, well, not as evil as a certain someone but it indeed got her bones icy.

Hiruma watched Mamori pressed the red botton on her phone, "What did she fucking say?"

Just at that very second, Mamori turned around with an emotionless face, "Youichi, " her tone was strange with a little evilness, "we'll shoot the ass out of her!"

Hiruma was a little stunned, "Um... Okay..." He sneered, "You shooting?"

Mamori turned back to her usual self again, "What? Shooting? No, no, no..."

"Then why did you fucking put up that creepy face?"

"I was angry, that's all!"

"You just don't want to admit that sometimes you just fucking want to be like me!"

"Why are you so furious? If you want me to carry a gun for you, fine... It's just that I would never pull the trigger."

Hiruma was pissed off, "Like when you heard me carrying too many guns? I don't need you to fucking..."

"Hhmmff!" Cerberus seemed to have detected something.

"What is it, Cerberus?"

The dog ran into the depths of the warehouse.

"I think he fucking smelled something."

------------------------------------------------

Cerberus stopped before a pile of wooden boxes.

"Wraafff!" He barked at the boxes.

"They are here?" Mamori frowned, "How could they possibly..."

"Give her a call."

"Now?"

"Yeah, so we can be sure whether she's inside."

"Gotcha..." Mamori clutched her phone and...

Beep... Beep...

"Alright, bitch, we know you're fucking in there!"

"But Youichi... Don't you think this is too easy? Shouldn't we be searching every corner of the place looking for clues?"

"You watched too many fucking detective films... She didn't know we fucking brought a dog."

"A dog... Yes, a dog!" An angry voice came from inside the boxes.

"Back up, she might shoot." Hiruma told Mamori.

But Mamori didn't move, instead she said, "Gimme a gun."

"What the fuck..."

"Just gimme it!"

So Hiruma gave her a gun.

Mamori showed that emotionless face again...

"Get out or I'll shoot the hell of your ass!"

Bang!

There was a shot. But it didn't come from Mamori or Hiruma. It was from inside the box.

With Meiyuu in her arm, Rosemary came out. She's got that crazy laughing face you see in mangas... "I'm not letting you get your little girl back this easy... You ain't gonna get me!" Suddenly she put on a gas mask.

Boom!

Smoke filled the warehouse within seconds. With Rosemary out of sight, Hiruma had one last idea. He aimed his gun as the boxes and shot like crazy for a dozen times till he used up all the bullets.

"What are you doing, Youichi?"

"You'll fucking see... Hehehehe."

-----------------------------------------

Up the ladder and out of the warehouse, Rosemary was exhausted.

"God I've still got some juice left." She took a quick drink and carried Meiyuu into the woods. "You gave me 3 years of prison, well, not only 3 exactly but I managed to escape... And now, I'm going to make you and your whole family feel like dying for the rest of your life!" She put Meiyuu down next to a tree and took out a knife. "The soft little face of a 3-year-old, precious but fragile... I'll leave my signature on it so I can haunt you for ever!"

But the knife was a little dirty.

"I'm a merciful person, Hiruma girl, so I'll clean my knife first before I leave my name on your skin." She turned around to find a rusty faucet about a foot tall, "This is just perfect..."

When she'd done cleaning the knife, she found nobody under the tree.

"Where the hell did the girl..."

"Freeze!"

It was Meiyuu, pointing a gun at her spine just like her father did 3 years ago.

"What do you think you are doing? You can't hurt me!" Rosemary laughed, but the familiar feeling did terrorize her.

"Put down your knife." Meiyuu ordered.

"Make me, sweetie."

"Why did you kidnap me?"

"When did you snitch my gun?"

"Answer my question! Why are you sabotaging my parents?"

Rosemary smiled faintly but soon turned back to her crazy self and said, "Because your father put me behind bars for 3 long years... It was intolerable!"

"Then you deserved it! What did you do?"

Rosemary felt that she's got Meiyuu's curiosity in her hands so she led her on, "Well, what I did was just... I only sold... All I did was..."

She fell to the ground, unconscious.

Meiyuu was shocked ----- "I didn't do anything!"


	17. Chapter 17: The Law of Hell

17. The Law of Hell

Meiyuu stared at the fainted kidnapper, frightened. "I didn't do anything!" She was frozen with her hands still pointing the gun forward. "This can't be good... They'll think that I'd... Oh, no..." There came her parents.

Mamori was still coughing, "Damn smoke..." Then she saw Meiyuu in her unusual pose.

Meiyuu bit her lip. She was too scared to move... "Mom..." She uttered, "I think I just killed her... But I didn't do anything!"

Hiruma and Mamori stopped to examine the crime scene. Then Mamori suddenly shouted, "Aha! I've got you! You icky, lousy, nasty bitch!"

Hiruma and Meiyuu stared at her.

"You actually made the adjectives rhythm... Fucking nice." Hiruma remarked.

"Dad, what's mom talking about?"

"I have fucking no idea..." Hiruma paused for a second. "Wait, " He said, "I think I know what you did."

Mamori smiled, "It was pretty smart to come up with such a brilliant idea within seconds, right?"

"But it wouldn't fucking work if this bitch hadn't been so goddamn thirsty."

"What did you do, mom? I'm all confused."

Mamori blinked at her, "I mixed the juice in the two cups... It's good that you fell asleep before you finished the whole cup... So she just got a taste of her own meds and fell asleep like you did."

"You got fucking lucky." Hiruma sneered.

Mamori glared at him, "What did you do then, smart guy?"

"Daddy woke me up by shooting the boxes like crazy... It was very loud." Meiyuu answered for Hiruma.

"Tch, it would be a whole fucking different story if we hadn't brought Cerberus along."

"Yeah, Cerberus has done a big help." Mamori agreed.

"Hhmmff!"

Finally, Meiyuu sighed in relief and handed her gun to Hiruma, "So I didn't kill her... But what are we gonna do with her?"

Hiruma showed his most scary smile, "I think I have a few choices for this fucking criminal." Then he started to take things out from nowhere, "We have fucking tape, rope, chains, handcuffs... C'mon, pick something."

Meiyuu stepped up and suggested, "Can we do all of them?"

"Good idea..." Mamori said.

"I thought you weren't as evil as dad and I was... But now, nevermind..." Suddenly, Meiyuu realized that she hadn't had lunch yet, "I'm hungry, mom..."

"What do you want, sweetheart?"

"Can I have pizza? I want pepperoni and cheese."

Hiruma quickly dialed a number.

----------------------------------------

"Hello?"

"_Buy me a pizza, fucking shrimp, pepperoni and cheese. I want it delivered to the zoo. You'd better not take anything with you 'cause I want it here at the speed of light._"

"Hi, Hiruma-san?! Umm, okay... But, but I have to at least take my wallet so I can buy a ticket to enter the zoo, right?"

"_No need, fucking shrimp... Just say these fucking magical words, 'dolphin girl'. It's a VIP code. Then the fucking guard will let you in without questioning._"

"Dolphin girl... Fine..."

"_Better be here quick. We'll be waiting by the Tasmanian devils._"

"Yes, Hiruma-san."

Hiruma hanged up.

"That, that was unexpected..." Sena sighed.

----------------------------------------

On the other hand, Mamori called the police, "Yes... We've just caught the prison breaker... She's here under control... No one's injured. Yeah we'll be waiting outside the woods. Okay, thanks" She hanged up.

With Rosemary's hands handcuffed and legs tied, the Hirumas left the woods as if nothing had happened.

----------------------------------------

The pizza actually arrived before the police did.

"Impressive, Sena, you're even faster than before!" Mamori said in surprise, "Wanna join us?"

Sena nodded, "No problem. But why are you guys at the zoo today?"

"For fun..." Hiruma answered, "You never take your wife anywhere?"

Just then, a police car stopped next to their table. "Ms. Hiruma here?" A policeman asked.

"You'd better tell me what happened, Hiruma-san... This isn't just a family holiday, is it?" Sena asked.

-------------------------------------------

When Rosemary was taken out of the woods, she was muttering to herself.

"What's she saying?" Meiyuu asked.

"I think she's cursing." Sena said.

"Maybe she's telling herself this isn't true." Mamori guessed.

Hiruma only smirked, "I think it's neither... What I think she's fucking saying is the law of hell..."

"The law of hell? What is that, daddy?"

"Hehehe... It's 'Victory of the Evilest'."

Mamori raised her eyebrows, "I think you stole Darwin's 'Survival of the Fittest'."

"He wouldn't fucking mind... Hehehe..."

-------------------------------------------

A year later, Meiyuu became the elder sister of a little boy, Meiritsu.

"It's a weird name..." She thought, "What does it mean, daddy?"

"The law of hell." Her father answered.

Meiritsu wasn't like his sister, which means, he wasn't like his father. He did have the smart genes of the Hirumas, though. But he was more introverted than anyone Hiruma had ever met. Sometimes, even Mamori thought he was _too _timid to be a boy.

Meiritsu never found outdoor activities too interesting, not like Meiyuu. Meiyuu adopted football very quickly. "I'll make a fine quarterback, dad. Maybe I can do better than you, who knows?" But Meiritsu would never say that, because he didn't even like going outside. Instead, he likes reading, _very much_. Whenever somebody calls for Meiritsu, he always replies, "I'm reading."

Hiruma and Mamori once discussed the unique condition of their unique son, "No way he's this bashful..." Mamori said, "Do you think he has autism?"

To Mamori's surprise, Hiruma didn't mind Meiritsu's behavior at all for all these time, "Fucking no. People with autism hide, not read... I don't think he's got any problem. You're just fucking paranoid."

"No, I'm not, Youichi. Meiritsu is going to enter middle school soon. He wouldn't be able to find any friends if he's_ this _unsociable. He doesn't even talk!"

"No big deal, he doesn't need those lousy kids to be his friends. And Meiyuu can look after him. He's been through elementary already, he'll be fucking fine."

"Meiyuu won't stay in middle school forever and not even remembered by his homeroom teacher at elementary is no way near being 'fine'. Maybe he should get to know the place earlier so he won't feel too uncomfortable when he enters a new place."

"Whatever... But you should just fucking let him be."

Mamori had a strange feeling, "Youichi, I'm just taking care of him, not trying to change his personality. Do you know something I don't?"

"Why would I? You see him more often than I do."

So Mamori didn't ask anymore.

---------------------------------------------

"Taking Meiritsu to school? During practice? You've got to be joking, mom." Meiyuu said.

"It would only be a few minutes... You can go earlier and just show him around. It's only a Saturday, Meiyuu, it wouldn't bother you at all."

"Yes, it would... I'm not doing it, mom."

Mamori sighed, "Okay, maybe I'll just take him there... But it wouldn't work out that well if I were around. You'll be the one to take care of him in the future."

Meiyuu's eyebrows twitched, "Anything you want, mom, just don't make me take him to school alone, okay? I'm busy. We have a practise match with the Chameleons next week and I must come up with some kind of strategy."

"Chameleons?" There came a voice from the corner, "You mean the team with one of the best linebackers in Tokyo?"

"Who's talking, oh my god, Meiritsu?" Meiyuu's mouth was wide open, "Do you even watch football?"

"I read, sis. I also read Amefuto Weekly. Well, just started reading a few weeks ago. What I think is that you guys can take the Chameleons down if you, umm... Come, sis, I'll draw the formation for you."

Half in doubt, Meiyuu walked to him and watched him draw, "Unbelievable!" Meiyuu stared at his drawing, "You sure you only started to read about football a few weeks ago?" For a second, she made up her mind, "I'm taking you to school on Saturday. You _must_ come! And I'll be saving the manager's spot for you."

"That's backdoor dealing, sis..."

-------------------------------------------------

That night, Mamori told Hiruma what had happened when he was absent from the scene.

"Can you believe it, Youichi? It's a pity that you were down at the base. Meiritsu totally amazed Meiyuu!"

Hiruma had this expression on his face as if saying, "I fucking told you so."

"You saw this coming, Youichi?"

"A little. I fucking knew he wasn't just unsociable a long time ago. This kid reads like hell and gets fucking straight As from school and you have never asked yourself that the genius in him might just be the answer to his bashfulness?"

"Wow, I never thought it that way... So he's also into football?"

"You mean the fucking mind game part,? Yeah, he's pretty into it."

"Now I'm finally having the feeling that he's still our son." Mamori smiled in relief.

"You were just fucking paranoid, like I've said."

"No, I wasn't..."

Hiruma took a deep breathe and muttered, "And he's also got this hidden evilness in his heart..."

But Mamori wasn't listening.


	18. Chapter 18：The End

18. The End

"Before I take you to school, you should be fully prepared for who you're going to face." The night before the practise match, Meiyuu couldn't stop warning Meiritsu of potential danger. "You know that teenage kids can be extremely mean, " Not to mention Meiyuu herself was also a teenager... "especially to timid nerds like you, bro. School bullies are everywhere and _everywhere_ is where I cannot be all the time... Did my last sentence confuse you?"

"No... But I thought you ruled the school, sis... How stupid will it takes for a school bully to challenge the young brother of the most fearsome girl they've ever met?"

"I take that as a compliment, Meiritsu."

"You're welcome."

A moment later, Meiritsu spoke, "Are bullies really a headache? I thought they're your slaves."

"They are, but who know what they might do when I'm not around! And my Book of Thread can't cover everybody... Not like dad, he's got everyone on Earth in his BoT."

"I can help you, sis."

"How?"

"I learned to use the computer at four, what do you think I will do?"

-------------------------------------------

When Mamori walked past the study, she saw her two children staring into the computer screen editing various codes that didn't make any sense.

"What are you guys doing?" She asked by the door.

Meiyuu quickly turned around, "It's school assignment, mom." _No way mom's going to let us hack into the school's computer server for student files... I'd better lie._ Meiyuu thought.

Mamori blinked for a few times and said, "Okay." And she left.

"Thewww... That was close." Meiritsu laughed in relief, "If it had been dad..."

"Hehehehe..."

A familiar voice came from behind, "What are you fucking kids doing here, huh?"

"We are hacking into our school computer for student files, dad." Meiritsu disarmed himself pretty fast.

Hiruma turned to the screen, "How many times have you hacked into other computers since I taught you how?"

"Just once." Meiritsu didn't talk but typed the words out.

"Once? I don't believe you." Meiyuu said, "He's probably typing Spanish, dad. It's _once_, Spanish for eleven."

"Why do you kids need fucking student files?"

"To threaten school bullies, dad." Meiyuu answered, "So they won't dare go near Meiritsu."

Hiruma smirked, "I thought you're fucking the biggest school bully in all schools..."

"I am, dad. And I'm just trying to make Meiritsu the second biggest, that's all."

"Fine," Hiruma turned away, "just don't fucking let your mother know, okay?"

"Yes, sir." The kids replied.

---------------------------------------

Saturday morning, school.

"Hey, yah people, come over here!" Meiyuu shouted from the edge of the football field.

Meiritsu stood next to her.

"Meet my bro, Meiritsu. Meiritsu, these are my people."

Meiritsu bowed and said very politely, "It's a pleasure to see you guys." He also had a blushy effect on his face.

Somehow, the team sensed something different. _This is no ordinary nerdy bashful boy... This is Hiruma Meiyuu's brother!_ So they were very cautious.

"Why don't you go around and stir some trouble, Meiritsu? It's still 20 minutes before the match." Meiyuu suggested.

Meiritsu adjusted his glasses and nodded, "Okay." He left with a very innocent smile, just like any other lovely young boys.

"Keep your bluetooth on you ear, Meiritsu. I'll call whenever I need you."

"Got it, sis."

----------------------------------------

The school was almost empty (It's Saturday, people!)with only a few sports team members running around getting ready for practise.

"It's just like any other school... Sis was being paranoid." Meiritsu murmured to himself.

Suddenly, 3 enormous shadows blocked the light from his back. "There you go..." Meiritsu muttered slowly as if he knew this was going to happen. He turned around, "Can I help you?"

The biggest of the 3 spoke, "You the Hiruma boy?"

"Without a doubt, yes, sen-pai."

"Doesn't look like one..." The one on the left mocked, "He's so small and nerdy..."

The 3 had very mean faces, so Meiritsu can recognized their faces clearly after searching in his memory of all the students in this school. _Grizzly, Pineapple and Meatloaf are their nicknames. _Although 100% percent clear of their dirty little secrets, Meiritsu remained smiling in very graceful manners.

"Why don't you move to the corner, kid. So we 3 can show you how to be a real man..." They said laughing like monsters.

Meiritsu was still smiling, "You mean you 3 weedy jerks?"

The three bullies were numb for a second, "What are you talking about, kid?"

Meiritsu's face suddenly changed, "Your name is Grizzly, right?" He looked at the biggest bully in the middle with his shiny evil emerald eyes. "You just made out with your girlfriend in the janitor's closet, didn't you?"

Grizzly's whole body trembled a little. "Wha, what are you talking about, kid?" All he could do was to mechanically repeat his last warning.

"I mean, your shoes smell like air freshener mixed with at least 4 types of cleanser and you're telling me you've never been there today? And there's the blue fabric stuck on your belt exactly the same kind of fabric I saw on a girl's skirt when I walked past her at the front gate 15 minutes ago. Any more questions?"

For an instance, the 3 bullies realized that they were not only facing an ordinary small boy but the many brains and the evil heart hidden behind this angel face.

Meiritsu's face changed back to normal, "Want me to call the janitor or the headmaster?"

The three disappeared from his sight within 2 seconds. Their shirts were so wet that you can wring water out of them.

Meiritsu didn't move from his original spot. "'Victory of the Evilest', probably the _rightest_ quote of all times... Theww, kids these days." He sighed.

Then, a girl's voice came from behind. "Nice job, kiddo."

Meiritsu turned around and saw a fair tall girl in a pepper-and-salt skirt. Her eyes were like black pearls.

_That's the Maruko girl! _Yes, Meiritsu remembered her file. The daughter of Marco and Maria. "You're a friend of my sister's, Maruko, if I had not mistaken." He said.

"You're Meiritsu?" The girl said in amaze, "I should have remembered your face..." _Her lips were very sexy. _But of course Meiritsu didn't say that out loud. He was blushing, _really_ blushing.

"Just call me Malia, if you don't think that's too awkward. Meiyuu should have told you to call me that way."

"M... Malia neechan..."

"You're one shy little kiddo, aren't you? But it's alright. Now, kiddo, how did you know I'm Maruko?"

_Because I hack into the school's computer and grabbed a few of your sexy bathing suit photos from the school's underground website for perverts and hypocrites._

Of course he didn't say that out loud. "Well, my sister showed a few photos to me so I recognized you."

"Oh, okay." Malia smiled. Meiritsu had never seen such a beautiful smile before. He blushed even harder. Malia continued, "It was very brave of you to stand up to those horrible school bullies... Well, maybe your sister's the biggest bully but she's very nice to good people."

"I know that, Malia neechan. She's only mean to those who never realize how ignorant they are. I know that."

Suddenly, a voice came from his left ear. "Meiritsu, where are you! Come at once, the match is starting!"

"Ouch... My ear hurts..." Meiritsu took the bluetooth out from his ear, "My sister called, I must go now."

"Alright, kiddo." Malia replied, "And I'll be there as soon as I finish my work at the lab."

"Lab?"

"Yeah, with the new chemistry teacher. She's hot, you'd want to see her."

"Umm... Okay. See yah, Malia neechan." Then they left the hall heading for different directions.

_I think I've just met the most beautiful girl in my life... But she's older than I am... Oh, well..._

----------------------------------------

At home, Hiruma monitored the two kids' motions.

"Where are they now?" Mamori asked when she walked past his chair.

"Meiyuu's at the field, getting ready for the match, body temperature 37.6 centigrade, a little heated-up but it's good for the fucking match."

"You even have their body temperature monitored?"

"Yeah, but I just fucking saw something very strange."

"What is it?"

"Meiritsu, his fucking temperature is flying on the roof but he just came out from the hall with the central AC on. What do you think fucking happened?"

"He just talked to someone, didn't he?"

"He talked to a total of 4 people in the past 20 minutes. 3 are fucking school bullies, Meiyuu tracked them down so I can recognize them on the screen. But the 4th person was not recorded in this fucking computer."

Mamori bit her lip and suggested, "Try the 'Surrounding Material Analyzer'. If she used a special kind of perfume, you can track her down."

So Hiruma used the analyzer.

10 seconds later, the results came, "Cola-flavored Perfume" was the answer.

"Wow, " Mamori gasped, "now Meiritsu is definitely _your slave_."

"Hehehehe..."

------------------------------------

At the lab, Malia found her new chemistry teacher washing a test tube.

"I heard you talking to someone at the end of the hall, Malia. Saw a friend?"

"Yeah, that was Hiruma Meiritsu. Hiruma Meiyuu's brother."

"Really..." the teacher stopped washing, "Hiruma, right?"

"Yes, Hiruma." Malia paused, "Something wrong?"

"Nothing." The teacher went on washing the tube.

5 seconds later, the teacher asked, "Want to try some homemade heroin?"

"Sensei..."

---------------------------------------------------------THE END-------------------------------------------------------------

Yes! That was the end of the whole series! I'm sorry it ended so awkwardly but I had to. School's starting in 2 weeks and the coming semester is very important to me because I'm going to university next year. I didn't want to end it like this but I've tried my best to make it end like an ending Meiyuu and Meiritsu's story is not over yet!. Maybe I can do another series next year but this year, NO! And I will not be around for a long time I suppose, after school starts. So, what I want to say here is THANK YOU for reading all along and giving priceless reviews that made my day. This is all I can say now. Sorry if you're not used to my 'leaving a message at the end of the chap' action because I never did this in previous chapters. Thank you again for R&R. Your valuable support keeps me going all this time!

Special thanks to: toya1255, princesss-myu, Jillian Leonhart, animchan, Bar-Ohki, chainedheart999 and YOU if I had missed.

Anyway, the story ends here. 18 is a good number. I should continue the story in the future but the Marriage of Heaven and Hell really ends here. Sorry that I didn't come up with more omakes that you loved. Maybe in the next series if you wish... Well, time to say goodbye!

Thank you guys for all the sweetest memories!

Vivian


End file.
